#this meme format is even better when you can’t tell who is who

[deadpearls]

good evening gigolas truthers

[archivalofsins]

Addendum (September 23, 2024 5:03pm )- It was brought to my attention by a concerned friend inquiring if something had happened yesterday that this post can come off as complaining about a fandom issue of some sort. Because of how often "Don't be like x" (in particularly Futa) has been used in regards to ongoing Milgram fandom incidents.

It was not my intention to invoke those sort of alarming past experiences for anyone that may have come across this post. My intentions when writing this were to interrogate the prevalence of that phrasing when it came to Futa as a character while including the prisoner paired with him known for bullying as well.

To put it in a plain and jovial way- These are my feelings in regards to this topic in a meme format,

Since I have now been informed of how emotionally disruptive this phrasing can be given the things it's been associated with in the past at least within the tumblr Milgram community I will be putting it under a cut with one more addendum further down that uses the same phrasing.

Once again saying to not be like Mu.

It's easy for individuals to understand why they shouldn't be like Futa. In a lot of ways, not many people would see their actions as being similar to his even when they are. This is why I stress not to be like Mu either.

Because it seems to me that a lot of people are comfortable with being bullies as long as they convince themselves they were the victim first.

A trait that's present throughout both Futa and Mu's narratives. Even if not many people recognize how emotionally manipulative, insidious, and abusive this sort of behavior is socially.

Because just like with these two, some will convince themselves it's the other parties fault for doing something wrong first.

That the person who did something wrong should just,

"You apologize if you do something wrong, you learn that even before words, don't you?"

Q.09 Do you want to apologise to the person you killed?

Mu: I think the person who did something wrong first should apologise first.

These two are simply not as different as some fans like to tell themselves. They are both reactionary bullies. Just because one goes on offense (attacks) and the other defense (cries/deflects) doesn't make one any better than the other. That's why they both got into codependent relationships with another prisoner over the first trial intermission.

Both Amane and Haruka provide them with something. Giving Futa and Mu hope and help in a difficult situation. Along with something to do with themselves to prove their own worth. They also both took on a naturing and protective role in Amane and Haruka's lives. Making the other their main priorities as of the second trial.

23/07/05 (Mu’s Birthday)

Futa: Oi, you. Is he ok? He’s not even left his room lately.

Mu: You mean Haruka-kun? Hmm. Yeah, probably. I’ve been bringing all his meals to him so he should be fine. Isn’t that great of me?

Futa: Hah? Who the hell says that sort of thing about themself. ……ah, no, well, right now I understand a bit. When you’re feeling down, it’s nice to have someone who relies on you and accepts you. The rest of us can’t really understand you from where we’re standing. But well, if you’re Haruka’s “salvation” then I guess it really is great.

Mu: Salvation……? I don’t know what you mean. Futa-kun, you don’t sound like yourself. Did you hit your head or something? Oh, wait, you actually did, didn’t you. Ahaha. Ah, putting that aside though, did you know it’s my birthday today?

Q.02 What do you think of Haruka?

Futa: I can’t afford to be worrying about other people at the moment. Anyway, he’s not a little kid.

This is also why one of my first posts discussed them together. They were both even abandoned by their groups,

"Everyone else was having fun, weren't they? What about them?! Why is it just me?!"

Q.18 Do you regret anything?

Mu: I think maybe I should have chosen my friends a bit more carefully.

Q.11 Who do you want to see right now?

Mu: I miss my friends too. But most of all, Papa and Mama.

Yeah, don't be like either of them, actually.

This is not a healthy thing to strive for. The only difference between them is that Futa takes the orders, and Mu gives them. Aptly portrayed in the relationships they've formed over the course of Milgram.

Also, a bully is a bully regardless of if they cry about it. Women have been weaponizing crying for decades. Stop pretending like this is a brand new undiscovered form of manipulation it's not.

Addendum (September 23, 2024 5:03pm ) continued: Also it was not intent to specifically call to attention Mu's characters flaws or take any digs at people who relate to her. Saying things like don't be like x character can be inconsiderate towards individuals who relate to that character a lot especially if it's something done on a consistent enough basis.

These are once again my feelings on that in meme format.

[delicrieux]

☆ﾐ 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢 “𝚘𝚑”

PART 10: BIG DICK IS BACK IN TOWN

y/n is back in brooklyn for the holidays. thinking that a stream will make her feel less homesick for cali, she starts working on her famously titled hentai.free.srv. what was supposed to be a relaxing stream turns into a special delivery about two hours in.

─── corpse husband x reader ─── soc. media + written fiction! ─── word count: 2.2k ─── ❥ req: Here's one... You know those apps for delivery like Domino's or whatnot... What if reader is streaming Among Us with Corpse, and reader mentions they're hungry and Corpse offers to order them food, and readers like no no it's fine... Then there's delivery at the door (Corpse ordered beforehand) 

author’s note: fucky format is also back in town baby!!! also if you find any mistakes - no u didnt <3 thank u everyone for enjoying this story sm i literally cant believe how feral yall going strawberry cow was a nuclear explosion im still recovering tbh. got an ask a while ago and decided to incorporate it into myso. happy holidays everyone! myso will continue on monday!

ultimate masterlist.  ҉  myso masterlist   ҉   previous.  ҉   next.

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Indeed, being soft on any social media platform was the biggest disgrace and needed to be eliminated post haste. Moreover, it was a slippery slope - once you start flooding your timeline with cute imagery and heart emojis, what will stop you from posting inspirational Facebook quotes? Disgusting. If Rae were here, she would chide you (not you thinking about her as if she’s dead or something). For once in your life, you feel like you deserve it. 

Alas, you hope this little chaos you’ve caused is enough to throw everyone off. The stans, especially. You know the hashtags, you’ve seen ARMY scourging for info online with the same fervor and ruthlessness 1 Direction fans hacked airport security cameras just to spy on the boys. If you had any dirty secrets online, they are out to the public now - thankfully, besides the Harry Styles stan account (with edits and all), you have nothing. Though, now that you think about it, exposed nudes would have been better than your Punk!Harry edit receiving almost a million views. God, your life’s a fucking mess.

Your fans aren’t the only ones out for info - you, too, are trying to decipher Rae’s message. Code: Barbecue Sauce. The two of you had come up with it roughly two years ago, around the same time when you promised that if you didn’t find significant others by the time you’re 40, you’ll just marry each other. It was one of the many rules found in your friendship codex. Barbecue Sauce signifies information - an exchange of information. And depending on how it ends or begins (”So I’m sitting there” alludes to Rae, “On my titties” alludes to you), secret data on that person is given away, usually free of charge. 

But why? And to whom did Rae give away what? You had pestered her mercilessly and even sent some voice messages where you were crying. You were only crying because of a video of a grandpa smiling you saw on TikTok, but you are a snake, and so you put those tears to good use. If streaming doesn’t work out, you’ll just become an actress. Hollywood would love you. Your PR firm sure as fuck wouldn’t, though.

Rae was having none of it. She said you’ll figure it out eventually. Told you to channel your superior puzzle skills. You were quick to remind her that you can barely count to ten without having an aneurysm. Oddly serious, she admitted that she worries for you sometimes. Why only sometimes?! you demanded. She merely sighed. uttering under her breath something that sounded closely to “Boke.”

You leave her for barely a week and she’s already neck deep in the gay volleyball anime, hoodie and cardboard cutout and everything. Your life is falling apart.

But Brooklyn is nice. It had snowed when you stepped off of the plane. Thousands of snowflakes sprinkling into your hair, dotting your cheeks and nose. You missed this sight back in Cali. You missed your parents, too. 

Home cooked meals, old sweaters, your old room and about 40GB worth of old high school pictures on your computer. You went through them all one night. Some were stomach churning, cringe inducing nightmares. You were especially fond of those. Texted some of your friends that were still in Brooklyn, met up, decided to bake. Bad idea, Rae was the resident chef back in Cali. Besides laughing till your stomach hurt, and almost burning down your kitchen, nothing all that significant happened. Somewhere down the line, at about 3 am, half-way through a cheesy rom-com you had the overwhelming urge to text Corpse.

That’s where the problems really started. God, you missed California, missed being in the same timezone with a guy you hadn’t even met yet, how embarrassing is that?! You missed skating around and taking pictures of the beach in the setting sun, sending it to him, silently wishing he was with you to admire the view. 

You really want to call him. And to hang out with him. But for some reason, the thought of that springs up immediate anxiety and you shy away from asking. Him sending you cute good morning texts doesn’t help, either. Maybe it’s better he doesn’t know that you’re a blushing, stuttering mess each time you read “baby”. 

Late evening. Your stream is already set up, people are slowly trickling in and you greet them with a grin and a soft “Hello! Hi hi!”. You did your best to make your room a perfectly chaotic backdrop - led lights, an embarrassing amount of anime merch and plushies. You always try to balance out your weeb side by dressing hot as fuck for your streams - today’s inspiration just so happens to be egirls. Mostly because you watched one too many egirl make-up tutorials on TikTok, and also because you’ve been listening to Corpse’s song all day.

Yeah, no, who are you kidding, you dressed up this way because you were hoping Corpse was watching your stream. You didn’t forget your cat headphones, either. You know he likes them. You want to make him suffer. Perhaps then, finally, he will ask you out, so you wouldn’t have to.

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“I feel like,” You start when you put away your phone, staring idly at the chat, “I feel like I need a new name for you guys. Calling you guys after two years of streaming is just... weird, no? I also don’t respect men so I don’t want to call you guys. Like, so many creator’s have, like, a name for their fans. Uhm, Cody Ko has the chodesters, Kurtis Conner has, uh, folks? Kurtis Town? Citizens! Markiplier has mommy issues--” You can’t help snorting, “So, I’ve been, like, thinking - I know, shocking! - so I was thinking I’m gonna name you cockroaches. Because you’re grimy little shits impossible to kill. And also then I can use the legendary Minaj meme ROACHES!”

Your stream enthusiastically echoes ROACHES, making the chat swim. Yes, if anyone would enjoy such a name, it would be your audience. You’re as equally proud as you are disturbed.

“Well, anyway.” Leaning back into your chair, you throw your arms out with a bright grin, “Big dick is back in town, baby! If you noticed the backdrops different, it’s cuz I’m in Brooklyn now. Don’t ask me when I will return to Always Sunny, I don’t plan that far ahead.”

While Minecraft boots up, you decide to answer a few questions.

r u dating sykkuno?

You want to smack your head into the keyboard, but as it is, you can’t exactly afford a new one, so you refrain, “No, Sykkuno and I are not dating, we are just good friends. Uhm, I’m not sure how much I’ll have to repeat this, but, we really aren’t, so if the roaches could chill - Oh my God, that sounds so stupid, I love it - uh, yeah, if the roaches could chill that’d be great.”

the roaches lmao sounds like we’re a sports team

“Oh shit, yeah it does, uh-- maybe I can make like, jerseys or something. That’d be cool, I think.”

how disappointed are your parents with the way your life turned out?

“My parents are actually not disappointed at all!” You say with a cute little smile, “Uhm, they’re both really proud, actually. They’re glad I found something I love doing and made a job outta it. Dad finds my Youtube videos endearing. Yes, they watch pretty much all of my videos, unless I explicitly tell them not to. And yeah, with all the fucks and thirsting for anime characters. Uhm, it was very embarrassing at first, but I mean, after a while, shame just...doesn’t exist anymore, I guess? Funny thing about my parents, actually, when they watch my videos-” You eye catches a comment, “Oh! No, they only watch my Youtube videos. They don’t know how to use Twitter, thank God. Uhm, anyway-- when they hear a name they don’t know, like, I dunno, Dabi, or something, they google--” You’re grinning by now, eyes crinkling, giggling softly, “--who that is, and buy me like, merch and stuff. It’s really cute. 

can i be adopted by ur parents plz

will you and corpse ever collab?!

You were about to answer, though the man of the hour himself decides to do it for you.

Corpse_Husband: yes.

Okay, not to say your heart skipped a beat, but it totally did. With a pleased smile, you nod, like one of those bobble head toys sold at the dollar store. The motion is oddly reminiscent of Sykkuno’s own nod. Perhaps you had picked it up from him. The chat seems to notice.

pack it up, sykkuno

More questions pile about this mysterious collab you and Corpse are planning. Yeah, you’d like to hear more about it, too, since he single highhandedly decided one was happening right now. Corpse remains silent. Fine, keep your secrets. 

“Okay, guys, oh, I mean, roaches, Oh my God--” You’re covering your mouth, giggling, “-calling all roaches, calling all roaches, calm down. Everyone grab a snack and a blanket I’m turning up the music volume so we can all chill. Entering chill zone. Entering chill zone. Roaches, prepare.”

we are prepared

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An hour or so passes and you grow hungry. It shows with the amount of cakes you had baked in your server. Currently, you find yourself throwing eggs at the wall of one of the renovated houses, your face scrunched in concentration and slight frustration. 24 of the 50 eggs have been wasted. “What’s a girl gotta do to get some chicks around here?” you had uttered under your breath, until, finally, a screech - the egg finally spawns a mob. Your mouth falls open, “Aww, look!” You approach it, so small, walking in zigzags beside you, “It’s a baby chicken! Die, bitch.” The baby chicken is no more as you swing your bedazzled (you have mods) diamond sword. You’re cackling by the time the dust settles.

y/n is a child murderer

“Roaches,” You address your fan-base, spurring another fit of laughter - you can’t get over the name, “I think I’m like, forgetting that eating in Minecraft won’t actually make less hungry in real life.”

take a break and go eat queen <3

“Fuck no, we starve and die like men. Now I actually really need another chicken.”

Another twenty minutes trickle by and you’re trying to lure back a panda from the jungle when there’s a knock on your bedroom’s door. Whipping your head to the side, you slide down your headphones. At the same time, your mom pokes her head through the ajar door, “MOM!” You scream, “Get OUT of my room I’m playing Minecraft!” But your yell has no actual bite to it, as you don’t manage to hide your smile. Your mom laughs, doing some sort of sign language and motioning for you to follow her with her head. That or it’s some sort of performative dance. 

“I’m live right now,” You tell her, pointing at your screen. She knows this already, though, “do you want to say hi?” 

The roaches spam the chat with friendly hellos. You mom, quite impatient now, waves you over. 

“Sorry, roaches, mom needs something. Be back in a bit!”

Stopping the stream, you rush out of your seat and pleased she slinks into the hallway. “What’s this about?”

“Your pizza came.”

“My what now?” You echo, confused.

“Domino’s. You ordered pizza?”

“What? No? I was busy with the stream, I never--”

Thankfully, you had managed to grab your phone from your room before you exited. You almost choke on spit once you read the messages.

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You decide that it’ll be impossible to stream after experiencing what you had just experienced. You tweet out a quick apology to the roaches (God, that fucking name) and say that you had a breakdown but you’re okay. That is as a close to the truth as you managed to muster. It’s a sad sight, chewing and crying; your mom winced when she saw your state - disheveled hair and rundown eyeliner and everything. “D’aww,” She had muttered, caressing the top of your head, “don’t cry my little raccoon.”

If anyone was ever to ask you where did your chaotic nature come from, you’d answer with my mom. To make yourself feel better, you took a selfie - duck face and peace sign and the horrible 2000′s angle. Sent it to Rae. 

looking hot, her message read. 

thanks, was all you replied with.

You couldn’t just leave things as they were. Once you calmed down, you wanted to text Corpse, but how would you follow up the ungodly caps lock and screeching? Impossible. An idea sprung to mind, one that was brave. Taking the first step.

Instead of sending a text, you sent a voice memo.

“Thank you for the pizza, it was delicious.”

You voice still sounded a bit raspy. His reply was instant. Your heart skipped a beat. He sent a voice memo back.

“Glad you liked it, baby.”

He was going to be the death of you.

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tags (in italics is those i couldn’t tag! make sure all’s ok w your settings!) : @littlebabysandboxburritos - @fairywriter-oracle - @tsukishimawh0re - @ofstarsanddreams - @bbecc-a - @annshit - @leahh19 - @letsloveimagines - @bellomi-clarke - @wineandionysus - @guiltydols - @onephootinfrontoftheother - @liamakorn - @thirstyfangirl - @lilysdaydreams - @pan-ini - @mxqicshxp - @tanchosanke - @yoshinorecommends - @flightsandfantasy - @liljennyx3 - @slashersdream - @unknown-and-invisible - @sinister-sleep - @fivedicksinatrenchcoat - @mercury–moon - @peterparkerspjsuit - @unstableye - @simonsbluee - @shinyshimaagain - @ppopty - @siriuslystupid - @crapimahuman - @ofthedewthesunlight - @mythicalamphitrite - @artsyally - @corpsesimpp - @corpsewhitetee - @corpse-husbandsimp - @hyp-oh-critical - @roses-and-grasses - @rhyrhy462 - @sparklylandflaplawyer - @charbkgo - @airwaveee - @creativedogs - @kaitlyn2907 - @loxbbg - @afuckingunicornn - @fleurmoon - @yeolliedokai - @truly-dionysus - @multi-fandom-central707

more tags are in the comments bcs tumblr only allows me to tag 50 people max 💙

[aggravatetheaxe]

Hi there! I was wondering if I could request an imagine where a victim “escapes” from the slashers and hurts s/o in the process. What would the slashers do during and after? Thank you!!

Hi! I wasn't sure which slashers you wanted for this, so I put my list into a randomizer and went with the first 5!

Walter Sullivan

Thomas Hewitt

Jason Voorhees

Deacon Billings (OC Ghostface)

Erik ("The Phantom")

SLASHERS WHOSE VICTIM HURTS THEIR S/O

cw: mentions of suicide, reader being injured/in mortal peril, mentions of torture and killing etc etc

--

Walter Sullivan

Oh no. Oh dear.

You are possibly the only good, pure thing in this world or the Otherworld and someone hurt you? Walter is ... not happy, to put it lightly. The only person who should ever hurt you is him, and he won't do that unless it's for your own good.

This only enforces his belief that the world and everyone in it are monstrous. It drives home the truth he's already convinced of - this existence in terrible and torturous and needs to be destroyed if anything holy is ever going to be allowed to blossom again.

Whether The Victim is pre- or post- Walter's suicide, he's already stopping at nothing to go after them. He doesn't view it as personal, he doesn't hold any particular hatred for most (most) of his victims; they're simply links in a chain. But this person, the one who hurt you ... it's personal. They'll die in absolute agony.

If the victim in question is pre-suicide, Walter will bring them down and find somewhere to keep them for later. This will not be a quick death.

While they're bound/gagged or knocked out, he'll check on you. You're special, possibly even the Mother Reborn, and he can't let you die until the time is right. If you're seriously injured, he'll see to it that you're taken to the hospital, and pray to a dead God if he has to that you'll be alright. If you're not seriously injured, he'll do his best to patch you up - he lived on the streets for many years and had to take care of himself, so he knows basic first aid.

Once he's certain you're safe, he will put you somewhere where you won't witness what he's about to do. Even if you want to see it, he'll insist you stay hidden, saying the sinner doesn't deserve to be in your presence. You'll have to really convince him if for some reason you want to watch.

Their torture will depend on what they did to you. If it was just a few scrapes and cuts, he'll let them feel every ounce of pain before they die. If they really hurt you, their torture will be prolonged. In his mind, and according to his religion, death is a sacred sacrament, and this evil being doesn't deserve its release. If they did something to seriously traumatize and/or sully you ... the crime scene he leaves behind is going to be grisly, to put it lightly.

If the victim in question is post-suicide, the results will be similar, but he has absolute control over the Otherworld - and he will utilize that. He will have his creations take care of you and keep you somewhere safe ... they may be terrifying, but they won't hurt you unless he wills it. As for the victim, he can twist them into their worst nightmares over and over again before killing them. He will make them see their wrongdoings and pay for their evil. They will beg for mercy and there will be none.

After it all, he will simply move onto the next one, with you somewhere safe ... until it's time. Until it's time. You are so perfect.

Thomas Hewitt

Dammit. If he'd just been quicker or smarter, he could have caught them before they escaped and hurt you. He immediately blames himself.

There's no time to beat himself up over it, though. He briefly checks to make sure you're not bleeding from anywhere vital and sends you (or locks you up) somewhere safe before going after the victim. You're on your own for first aid for now - unless you're literally dying, he can't let them leave the property.

If you are literally dying, he's staying and doing all he can to help you. But if Hoyt yells, he may have to pawn you off on someone else and hope they do a good job taking care of you. He'll hold your face and give you tender kisses goodbye - whether you want them or not - because this might be the last time he ever sees you.

He chases the victim in a fever, much more erratic than you would expect from him. He's faster, less careful, more inclined to put himself at risk just to get a swing in at them. It's not generally anything personal when he kills someone - it's something he does for the good of his family, and because he was told to. This one he's not interested in saving for meat. They hurt you. You, his special person. He's going to grind them into the mud, and he's not even going to let Hoyt have a go at them.

Sometimes, sometimes, he struggles to see the animals in his victims. But this one ... he doesn't even feel the urge to twist them into an animal. That's a whole human, an evil one, one he wants to kill. It's a different feeling for him.

Once it's all over and everything's calmed down, he's rushing directly to your side. People don't come around all too often, so he's comfortable putting down the chainsaw for now. He neglects any skin projects he planned and lets someone else do the butchering, focusing on taking care of you, especially if you're seriously injured and put up in bed.

If you're not as seriously injured and tell him you're fine, he's still keeping an eye on you ... and making sure you're well-fed. You've been through a lot and it was all his fault. He doesn't want you to be exposed like that again. Next time someone comes around, he'll insist you hide somewhere.

Jason Voorhees

It's a toss up whether or not he'll actually notice you're hurt. Not because he doesn't care or anything, but because Camp Crystal Lake is a lot of ground to cover and there's a low chance he'll be in the same area as you at any given time.

For this imagine, though, let's assume you've found your way to him or he's sensed you're in trouble and has rushed to you.

You were supposed to be safe in the cabin, so he's a little irritated that you wandered out, but that's completely overshadowed when he realizes you're hurt. He stops everything he's doing and clinically and thoroughly pats you down, identifying every solitary injury.

Just like his mother before him, he is a vengeful soul, so he is not letting this go even if you're just scraped or bruised. If you are critically injured, he'll at least get you to the cabin and get a tourniquet on you.

Otherwise, he leaves you behind. Not very mindful, but you should know that he wants you to get back to the cabin or at least stay out of the way. He is no longer thinking of you - he has established his target and knows what he has to do. He's laser focused and decisive as he stalks after them, using anything at his disposal to get to them.

Their death is quick - he doesn't play around - but he has a lingering sense of irony and playfulness. If there's a particularly interesting weapon nearby, he'll take them out with that; or perhaps he'll hurt them in the way they hurt you, just, you know ... more fatal. And a lot gorier.

After that, he'll move onto their friends, until every last one is dead. Once his objective is completed, he is returning to you directly and finishing the job of patching you up.

He can't help but feel a little guilty that you were hurt. You shouldn't have left the cabin, true, but perhaps he should have been watching for you. He should have locked you up. Pamela might say rude things in his head. Then again, she might comfort him. If she doesn't like you, maybe she'll even wish he'd left you to die.

Deacon Billings (OC Ghostface)

Well ... you usually keep him around to scare off other Ghostfaces - something he's very handy at - but you don't usually run into trouble with his victims.

He doesn't really tell you to go anywhere in particular when he's killing. He knows you can take care of yourself. But now he feels stupid for not having a backup plan. Of course some asshole was gonna eventually identify you as his loved one and try to get cute. He should've had something prepared for that.

But, if he's good at anything, it's improvising. He skids into whatever room you're in, drops his weapon, and pulls his mask off right away to check you over. If you're only mildly injured, he's visibly relieved, and tells you to stay put while he deals with whomever hurt you. If you're more seriously injured, he'll grab your phone and shove it in your hand. "Get in the car, get the fuck out of here. Drive to the emergency room if you have to, just leave."

If you're unable to drive, he'll make you call emergency services - or call them for you, if he has to. The game is over, he's done playing; this isn't fun if he's not winning. Everyone in this place is gonna be dead and he'll be long gone by the time the ambulance shows up for you.

The one who hurt you is going to get an extra special surprise. A particularly grisly death, and a bunch of selfies/short videos of Ghostface with the corpse - taken with the victim's own phone, posted to their instagram, tiktok, facebook, sent to any discord groups, and any other social media they have. If he has the time, he'll even make them in meme formats (definitely posting with meme captions, the fucking troll). He'll probably send a copy to you as a "hey, look what I did!"

If there are survivors, especially if that survivor is the one who hurt you, you better believe he is immediately doxxing them. Since he's had a little time to cool down, he might even play the long game, maybe catfishing and blackmailing them. Ruining their pathetic little life even further would be pretty fun. In the end, though, they'll die like all the others.

When all is said and done, he's going to be there for you, helping you recover any way he can. He'd suggest rest (for an amount of time relative to your injury), some movies and candy, maybe some video games. And time spent with your favorite Ghostface, of course, right?

He'll never forget what happened, though. Even though the person is dead, he'll be stewing and pissed off about it for a long, long time. And he won't let something like that happen again, or at least, not without a contingency plan in place.

The hash mark/tally mark he stitches into his costume to symbolize this kill is gonna be twice as long and large as the others, maybe in the place you got hurt as a reminder.

Erik

You already know what's about to happen.

If anyone so much as hurts your feelings they're getting menaced and receiving a strongly worded letter - actually physically harming you? That's suicide.

If he can't immediately kill this person, or if you're seriously injured, his primary objective is helping/comforting you. He has to push down a lot of wrath to do it ... every instinct tells him to immediately dispatch the fiend responsible ... but you are more important to him than anything in this world, even revenge. He will administer any first aid you need and may even drug you with ether to ensure you rest.

Don't think that means your attacker is off the hook, though. As soon as he decides you're well enough, he will put you somewhere safe - lock you away if he has to - and kill them. His preferred method is the Punjab lasso, but if they did something particularly egregious, he'll knock them out and take them to his torture chamber. They have a lesson to learn before they go to Hades.

Another option is, like Deacon, playing the long game ... playing with his food, stalking them, making them live in fear before they die. But he has a lot of wrath in that skinny little body, so it's a toss up as to whether or not he'll actually be able to follow through with that for very long. It depends on his mood, really!

He will keep the killing and torture hidden from you, of course ... unless you express an interest in seeing the vengeance being carried out. He would be worried for you, however, and advise against it. Those sights are not for the faint of heart, and certainly not for someone as beautiful and good as you.

Once all is said and done, it's as if it never happened. As if that person never existed! What a happy thought! Sometimes you even think Erik has completely forgotten the incident ... until he's stalking another victim and he locks you away again, and you remember you are always on his mind. He will never, never let that happen to you again.

[anxious2dsimp]

General Dating Headcanons | Sero, Todoroki & Bakugou

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾｡･:*:･ﾟ★｡*✧･ﾟ:˚۰˚☽˚｡･:

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾｡･:*:･ﾟ★｡*✧･ﾟ:˚۰˚☽˚｡･:

Pairings: Sero x Reader, Todoroki x Reader, Bakugou x Reader

Reader: Gender Neutral!

Format: Headcanons​

Warnings: Cursing bc Bakugou 🙄 (as if I wasn’t the one who picked him lmao)

Request: :))) hellooooo :D hmmmm may i get general dating headcanons for sero, todoroki, and [insert your favorite character]? 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖 @smexy-goose

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾｡･:*:･ﾟ★｡*✧･ﾟ:˚۰˚☽˚｡･:

Hi again!! Omg yes, I’ll gladly write some hcs for the best bois! I had a hard time picking a fave, but since I have written for Kami and Kiri in the last request I decided to go with blasty boy❤️ (Also, I’m trying a new way to post requests, I hope it works!)

Sero Hanta

I feel like Sero is genuinely so fun to date, just like he said in that one dorm episode, he’s always the wild card.

He’s a goofball, so he adores making you laugh and smile as much as he can. I love him omg😭

Will definitely take advantage of his height (he’s among the taller ones in the class) and give you surprise hugs from behind and rest his head on yours.

He’ll also use his quirk on you for everything from pranks to just randomly pulling you to him to give you a quick peck or a hug :’)

He’s pretty standard with PDA, so he won’t go around making out with you in public but he will do little gestures like those <3

In private I feel like he’s definitely cuddly, he’s just so happy to be with you!

He loves having you over at his room to just chill or be in each other’s presence, even if you’re doing stuff individually.

Speaking of, the bakusquad definitely complains about you having privilege in using the hammock in Hanta’s room. 

Denki will whine like; “why does y/n always get to use the hammock? You said it was out of bounds!”

“That’s on pretty privilege, sorry! And you’re just jealous you don’t have a cool s/o like mine,” Sero will say and poke his tongue out from the hammock where you’re swinging togehter :’) 

I’m warning you now, if you had a healthy sleep schedule before going out with him, you can kiss it goodbye.

Sero will absolutely be up till like 3 am sending you memes and tiktoks that remind him of you.

And with him blowing up your phone you’ll most likely end up talking into ungodly hours of the night, the *sleep deprivation* only causing funnier conversations.

Those will end up becoming inside jokes that he’ll bring up to make you laugh while the rest of the class is like ???

That also results in some weird ass nicknames sorry not sorry

So he’ll sometimes call you regular stuff like babe and other times... he’ll call you things like “Bert” (FOR NO REASON??) or “Candied Blood Pumping Organ” instead of sweetheart lmao

Overall you two are just THE chaotic couple (and if you’re not generally that way he will bring out that side of you)

Pranking your classmates? Pranking each other? Random ass adventures? Trying weird food together? Dancing in the kitchen at midnight while sharing late night snacks? By going out with him you said yes to all of the above.

From sneaking out of the dorms for late night food runs to occasionally skipping class to go to the arcade or the beach, you usually can’t go a week without doing something fun togehter.

This one time you two were out with the Bakusquad and y’all stopped by a supermarket to get food. 

So you had to ask Bakugou to buy you something bc you and Sero had to stay outside and just hand him the money.

He was like “tf?? why? Just buy your shit yourselves!” You had to explain you two were banned from the store because Hanta had accidentally crashed a cart he was driving you around in into a display of cereal boxes.

Ah yes, good times.

Todoroki Shoto

I feel like he’ll definitely need a small push when it comes to relationships bc of his past, but once you’re with him he’ll care deeply about you and will try to make you as happy as you make him :’)

I’m begging you, please give this boy some luv and affection!! For the most part you’d probably initiate PDA because he’s too nervous to do it himself

At the beginning he wouldn’t even be comfy cuddling, solely because he’d be afraid of hurting you somehow :(

But once you’ve reassured him he complies, and from then on out you just have to open your arms and he’ll instantly know it’s *cuddle time*

It’a one of his favorite pastimes bc he just feels so safe and loved <3 he also just loves the feeling of you playing with his hair

Luckily you get to do it year round since you cuddle his hot side in the winter and cold side during the summer

I feel like he’s secretly insecure, so the fact that you trust him and love him for who he is makes him feel like he could melt <3

Because of that you’re the only one he truly opens up to and shows his real feelings to, not to mention the only one who can touch his scar

And though he isn’t great with words, one look at him during one of these personal moments when its just you two, and you can just see it in his eyes.

Especially if you kiss his scar, his eyes might even get teary this sweet boy I 😭

That’s also probably why he shares his precious cold soba with you

Since you’ve been together, Shoto has just been so much happier, so his siblings and mother LOVE you.

They’re constantly inviting you over for dinner when Endevour is working (bc he’s a huge buzzkill to say the least), and his mom adores when you come with Shoto to visit her :)

Todoroki really enjoys seeing you get along with the people he cares the most about...

 BUT what he hates is THE EMBARRASING STORIES HIS FAMILY TELLS YOU OMG (you live for them, but I wouldn’t tell him that if I were you)

“Fuyumi remember when Shoto-” “Natsuo, no💙“ your bf will say as he unconsciously squeezes your hand, both of the siblings laughing at Shoto’s glare.

You had to hold in your laughter so hard omg

Though he isn’t that talkative, you guys definitely have that kind of relationship where you two could be silent and still feel completely comfortable (oh I’m so jealous of that but nvm)

He’s definitely observant, so expect the most considerate gifts and the most assertive observations, he’ll always know what you need.

The type of observant that gives you a water bottle before you even notice you’re thristy during training, or switches sides while walking so you loop your arm with his on his warm side when you’re cold.

Also the type to gift you that one thing you really wanted but mentioned once like months ago along with your favorite snacks/drink (you best believe he has them all memorized bc he’s just that attentive)

Over all, just a really soothing relationship were you can be comfortable with each other and feel at home when you’re together.

Bakugou Katsuki

Ok so, I feel like you’d be a competitive couple, turning anything into a competition in an endearingly annoying way.

You’re definitely the type of couple to go to laser tag, an escape room, an arcade, etc, as dates >:) but the competitions don’t end there:

Who can plan the best date? Who can make the other blush first? Who can get the other the better gift? Who’s the better kisser? Who gets the higher score in class? Or wins at sparring?

Especially when it comes to productive stuff like training or academics, although he won’t admit it, he’s just pushing you to be your best because he knows how amazing you are :’)

All the bakusquad knows about your shenanigans and at this point they’ve learnt to stay out of it & go get the Advil just in case bless their souls lmao

I’m sorry but he definitely calls you nicknames that purposely piss you off (with no ill intentions ofc), like “gremlin”, “dumbass” or “booger”

I suggest you also call him stuff like that back, like “angry pom” or “blasty” to get on his nerves >:)

You guys also definitely friendly bicker all the time, knowing that you take it lightly (though strangers won’t, resulting in some hilariously awkward situations)

“You’re such a fucking idiot,” he’ll say rolling his eyes as he messes up your hair.

Just watch his smirk dissapears when you reply, “no, u❤️″ It gets on his nerves, I just know it.

So he’ll chase you around as you call each other random stuff. While the other people at the convenience store are just like  👁👄👁

He never means it tho, keep in mind if you’re dating the self proclaimed future no. 1 hero he thinks highly of you :)

So he’d definitely be protective while simultaneously showing you off <3

Will always greet you with a kiss and keep his hand on your back or waist so ppl know you’re with him

RIP anyone who tries to hurt or flirt with you, I say try bc Bakugou will be exploding them even before they get the chance😅

Denki’s definitely almost gotten his brows blown off his face bc of that lol

Speaking of, the bakusquad still can’t get over the fact that THE lord explosion murder has a soft spot for you,

You mean you take care of his injuries, scold him when he burns himself out, touch his hair, and hug him when his moody... and you DON’T get cussed out and blown up? Shooketh

However they don’t see what happens behind closed doors, & how you’ve helped him with all the trauma he has experienced

You’re the only one who he is vulnerable with, you’ve seen him cry and he tells you about his nightmares and fears

You do the same with him, and you promise each other to get through anything together, which you’ve done so far :’)

Bc of that his parents love you, and his mom’s always going on about how she’s so glad you “stand” his son😂

Why can’t he be real ughhh

[waddles-ex-machina]

stone forest but it’s my fave moments from the comic that didn’t make it into the show

bc I love both versions of stone forest and bc I can 😌

first off, this guy sticks around after hilda gets the elf house off him and just follows her around and it’s really cute!! like, come on, just look at this guy and try to tell me he isn’t friend-shaped. he’s the only guy I trust. and he’s a piece of dirt

the elves cheering for hilda when she takes the house back!! wholesome, 10/10

meme format my beloved. I like to think that when david shows up in hilda’s drawer in the windmill episode it’s a reference to this panel :)

(putting the rest under a cut so none of my followers get tempted to vibecheck me)

okay, idk what’s going on with johanna’s whole vibe here but I love it. I bet she looks that way bc she’s wondering if hilda’s seen her gf

I’ve said it before and i’ll say it again, these two share a braincell. also hilda immediately takes this opportunity to sneak out to see frida?? (id include a pic but tumblr picture limit :(( ) anyway luke said frilda rights, thank u luke

even if she gets grounded immediately after this :(

the exaggerated ‘being sneaky(TM)’ poses…the comedic timing of the light coming on…raven looking more scared of johanna than he has any right to be…this scene has everything

okay so listen. listen. this one isn’t so much a “comics thing I wish was in the show” moment as its a thing that IS in the show and I have to mention it bc they made it so much BETTER. LOOK AT HOW FAR MY GIRL HAS COME

comics johanna: idk just stay behind me and maybe we won’t die

season 2 johanna: you wanna fuckin GO?

I don’t know which crew member looked at this scene and decided that johanna actually does not fuck around but I owe them my life

moving on

ok so for anyone who doesn’t know, everything in the actual ‘stone forest’ part of the comic is more or less the same but with one big difference - in the comics, alfur doesn’t come with hilda to trolberg, and david and frida are more minor characters who don’t even know hilda’s gone missing when all this goes down

so then who, you might ask, comes to rescue hilda and johanna from the mountain?? who steps up to this perilous task???

my

BOY

THIS GUY. SHOWS UP AND HELPS THEM GET OUT OF THE MOUNTAIN. y’all can laugh at me stanning this dude but he is the HERO of stone forest and I can’t believe he got robbed of his spotlight like this #straysoddeservedbetter2K20

oh and tontu and raven save johanna from the rocks in case you’re wondering. thank u tontu and raven, my wife lives to see another day

literally all raven does in this comic is help hilda fuck things up and save her mum’s life and I have no choice but to stan

this is rapidly turning into a stray sod appreciation post but like. this guy follows them all the way to the mountain, rescues them from a bunch of trolls and johanna’s first instinct is to put a mug on him. absolute icon. johanna just gives zero fucks in the comic and I’m so here for it. sometimes a family is a mum, her chaotic daughter, the house spirit and a piece of dirt 😌 (he doesn’t stick around much for mountain king and he’s hardly in the show at all but that’s okay bc he’s living in my heart rent free 🥺)

the ending is more or less the same and I ran out of images anyway so that’s it!! if u read this far down thanks for putting up with my stray sod appreciation stone forest comic post, I hope y’all enjoyed seeing me ramble abt the comics?? somehow?? in conclusion I love stone forest, thank u for your time

[whomst-art-thou-whomst-whomst]

Texts from the Lost Tomb part 6.1

🎶 Back on the bullshit I never got off🎶

Is this another unnecessary story arc?? With three sections??

Yes.

Wushanju Crew Chat

Wang Meng: You know, I’m someone who appreciates consistency in my day. My life is pleasant, very few issues indeed if you ignore the big ones. And yet. Yet here we are. With unresolved messes at the end of a day.

Wang Pangzi: SOMETHIN YOU NEED TO SAY MARY POPPINS

Wang Meng: We need to talk about Huo Daofu and the glittery bead curtain.

Wang Pangzi: MY FAVE TEEN WIZARD SERIES

Wu Xie: did you turn on that suggested word thingy lol

What glittery bead curtain

Wang Meng: I closed the shop at 6:00pm this evening on the dot. I locked all of the doors in and out of the shop very carefully, especially in light of recent events. The hall leading to the back office was empty. I filed the day’s paperwork, updated and sent emails, and then spent an extra hour organizing receipts and dusting. When I came back out, there were glittery iridescent bead curtains over the front entrance to the shop.

What could this mean?

Wu Xie: uh that you need to spend less time at work?

Wang Pangzi: LOOKS LIKE WE GOT ONE FOR THE DETECTIVES. THE MYSTERY OF THE BEDAZZLED THRESHOLD COMMENCES

Wu Xie: I think we can be relatively secure in thinking a glittery bead curtain isn’t a hostile threat

Wang Pangzi: SAYS YOU

I REMEMBER YE OLDE EXPLORATION TIMES HOW FAST THINGS GOT FURIOUS

BEANBAG CHAIRS SET AFLAME AND LEFT ON DOORSTEPS AS A WARNING

GLITTERBOMBS FOR DAYS

PANIC AT THE DISCO

Wang Meng: Ugh, forget it. I should have just taken them down, regardless of who they belong to.

Zhang Qiling: They are not mine.

Wang Pangzi: A BOLD STATEMENT COMING FROM OUR PRIME SUSPECT

SOMEONE QUICK GO DRAW CHALK AROUND THE DOORWAY TO MARK THE SCENE OF THE CRIME

Wang Meng: Do we know anyone who *would* sneak in and put those up? For whatever reason, legal or not? Even as a joke?

Wang Pangzi: ARE YOU SERIOUSLY ASKING WHETHER WE KNOW ANYONE WHO IS CHAOTIC, AN OUTLAW, A PRANKSTER AND/OR SNEAKS INTO PLACES

BECAUSE THAT WOULD MEAN OUR SUSPECT LIST IS LITERALLY EVERYONE WE KNOW EXCEPT FOR YOU.

Wu Xie: okay let’s think about this; for starters, I didn’t break into my own shop

Wang Meng: You would be in danger of doing some work in the process, that’s true.

Wang Pangzi: LOL

Wu Xie: ANYWAY let’s keep going. For example, Xiao Ge would only break in somewhere for a good reason. Xiao Ge, did you do this?

Zhang Qiling: No.

Wu Xie: okay who’s next

Wang Pangzi: YOU REALLY MISSED YOUR CALLING IN INTERROGATION TIANZHEN

REALLY PUT THE SCREWS TO HIM

IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE;)

Zhang Qiling: How can we be certain *you* didn’t do it?

Wang Meng: Admittedly that was my guess, too.

Wang Pangzi: WOW I SEE HOW IT IS

BLAME PANGZI AS USUAL

ANYWAY HOW DOES HUO DAOFU FIT INTO THIS

Wu Xie: Oh yeah him! Oops I got distracted

Wang Pangzi: UR ENTIRE HISTORY IN A NUTSHELL

Wu Xie: Ugh fuck off

Wang Meng what abt Huo Daofu??

Zhang Qiling: ?

Wu Xie: oh sorry xiaoge I didn’t realize you wouldn’t have spent much time around him last year

He and I go way back

Zhang Qiling: Way back where?

Babysitters Club Chat

Wang Pangzi: I CANNOT BELIEVE HE IS BUYING YOUR INNOCENT ACT

IF YOU EVER TURN TO EVIL WE ARE FUCKED

Zhang Qiling: ?

Wang Pangzi: YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHO HUO DAOFU IS

YOU WERE EXTREMELY POLITE AND BORDERLINE FRIENDLY TOWARDS HIM

Zhang Qiling: I wanted him to feel welcome. I wanted to be sure he understands he has a place here. A specific place.

Wang Pangzi: FOR A SILENT GUY YOU ARE A MASTER AT SUBTLE POWER PLAYS IM ALL TINGLY

LMAO THE IDEA OF WU XIE LEAVING YOU FOR HUO DAOFU IS HILARIOUS AND ALSO NOPE

Zhang Qiling: Rationally, I understand that.

Main Chat

Wang Meng: Huo Daofu is coming for the weekend—didn’t Wu Xie tell you? Wu Xie asked me to check in a week ahead so we could start getting ready for his arrival

Wu Xie: oh yeah I did do that

Wang Meng: Fortunately I know you and so I already went ahead and took care of everything.

Re: the trip

He made a deal with Wu Xie’s doctor that he would do periodic checkups on him here at Wushanju

Bc Wu Xie hates being in the hospital

And frankly the hospital hates him too

Wang Pangzi: FAMILIARITY BREEDS CONTEMPT LOL

I FORGOT HUO DAOFU WAS DOING THAT

A VERY CHIVALROUS GESTURE

WOULDNT YOU SAY

XIOAGE

Zhang Qiling: Is it safe for him to be here with a criminal loose on the premises?

Wu Xie: Right, back to the curtain! Let’s focus on the curtain, hmm?

Wang Pangzi: I AM SO LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS WEEKEND.

ALSO WE CAN RULE OUT XIAO BAI FOR THE CURTAIN SHE JUST SENT A SELFIE FROM NORWAY COVERED IN GREEN SLIME WITH ZERO CONTEXT, UR PROTEGE INDEED

Wu Xie: okay but who else would do something so oddly charming yet illegal and—wait.

Snake Eyes Chat

Wu Xie: hey, Glasses hasn’t been in touch lately right?

Li Cu: uh nope

Unless u count the outdated memes

Why, is money or Xie Yuchen missing

Or is this curtain related, I saw Wang Meng’s tweet

Wu Xie: haha no nothing to worry about really

(I mean maybe? but who knows)

Wang Meng is probably just getting a little paranoid in his old age

Li Cu: better than getting reckless and stupid as hell in ur old age

Wu Xie: …hey:(

Unknown Number: Li Cu, we discussed this.

Wu Xie: ????????

Li Cu: *sigh* fine, reckless and stupid as heck

Unknown Number: …close enough.

Wu Xie: EXCUSE who is that

Madame, Sir, Non-Binary Tree Spirit, etc—whomst the fuck

Are you

Li Cu is underage FYI

So Im staying on this chat

Li Cu: okay first of all, it’s not like that

Second of all I’m literally not underage I s2g

u threw the embarrassing surprise bday party, okay so u should remember

And C, that’s my counselor and I invited her. She wanted to meet u and I knew u wouldn’t agree to a visit so I added her to our chat

we have been discussing u

Wu Xie: Oh wow!!!!!!!

What a surprise:)

hi so nice to meet you:)

Main Chat:

Wu Xie: RED FUCKING ALERT

FUCK THE CURTAIN FUCK THE VISIT

IVE BEEN TRICKED INTO FAMILY THERAPY BY A SMUG TEENAGER WHO TEXTS UNKNOWN NUMBERS

Wang Meng: I assume that means something to someone here?

Not my problem? Good.

Wang Pangzi: AHAHAHA GOD I LOVE LI CU

HES LIKE ADORABLE KARMA FOR ALL THE SHIT YOUVE PUT ME THROUGH

IM RAISING HIS ALLOWANCE

Wu Xie: wait i give him an allowance

has he been collecting on two allowances??

Zhang Qiling: Three. I knew about both of yours.

Snake Eyes Chat

Wu Xie: so uh may I ask your name?

Unknown Number: you can call me Ms. Lee.

Now, if you’re comfortable talking in this format, why don’t you tell me how things have been going?

Wu Xie: oh everything is normal and fine and safe as usual, why do you ask:)

Li Cu: I heard about ur necklace thing. nice of you to NOT mention it.

another dangerous adventure. again. prick.

Ur lucky your cool boyfriend cares about you so much or you’d have already died like ten years ago

Wu Xie: lol try twenty years ago

Li Cu: That isn’t funny.

Unknown Number: …What?

Wu Xie: shit ur right, okay that was a bit glib, my apologies.

…I use humor as a coping mechanism?

Unknown Number: and Li Cu, how do you feel about that?

Li Cu: he doesn’t even know what that phrase means

He doesn’t cope, like ever

In fact

It’s kind of why we met

Which is a funny story in retrospect tbh

Wu Xie: haha what are you talking about sweetie hahaha need I remind you of certain anecdotes that could idk send me to jail maybe lmao

Unknown Number: …You know, perhaps an in-person meeting might be more effective?

Wu Xie: haha such a nice idea but why

Main Chat

Wu Xie: If I go to jail, I’ll have to create alliances for protection, right, that’s how it works on tv

Who do we know who spends time in jail

Other than Hei Yangjing, he’s only ever there for like 12 hours and i suspect he just gets himself arrested bc he enjoys the breaking out process

Also how’s the curtain case coming along

Zhang Qiling: Has someone threatened you?

Wu Xie: well not yet but soon I’m sure

Wang Pangzi: WHERE WAS THIS PARANOIA WHEN WE GOT TAKEN TO THE TEA HOUSE HUH

Snake Eyes Minus Your Fucking Therapist Chat

Li Cu: okay how tf did u pull off spy and undercover shit

u are sus as hell

Wu Xie: damn son is it pick on Wu Xie night

I missed the flyers or I would’ve invited my uncles

Also re: the curtain it’s been mostly solved

Li Cu: I’m not your son, idiot.

Wu Xie: …oh. Sorry, sorry, you’re right, bad choice of words, haha

Forget i said anything

Delete this chat even

Li Cu: shit I meant

Legally, biologically, I meant—

shit

…I turn into an asshole as a coping mechanism?

Wu Xie: oh that’s all okay! I have to go do something else now let me know if you need anything okay kid thanks!

Li Cu: goddamn it calm down who’s the kid here

lemme organize my thoughts so I can articulate my emotions fuckin healthily or w/e

Ugh maybe for like one afternoon we could go to Ms. Lee together? She knows how to word stuff

Wu Xie: uh…okay.

Li Cu: Anyway you don’t need to worry abt jail

As if you would survive prison for one day you’d piss off half the place in like an hour or less

I gave Ms. Lee the heavily edited version of the desert highway to hell roadtrip and i discussed it more in terms of like “nightmarish but still wouldn’t take any of it back”

Well maybe the sand

that shit was everywhere

Wu Xie: oh kiddo. It’s fine, really…You don’t have to explain yourself to me.

Li Cu: no, no it’s just

I do technically have a dad

who is an asshole. Being a son doesn’t really mean shit to me bc it sucked.

So you need to stop backing down just cuz ur guilty abt stuff. I’m really really glad ur not my dad in a good way. Do u get what I mean there

Where’s the mafia widower I followed into hell, huh

Wu Xie: Ur a good kid, despite my influence. I’m really glad you have someone to talk to after everything I…after everything. Wow this talking through feelings thing is kind of weird but nice ur right

Jfc no wonder it took me and xiaoge so long to—you know what, we won’t get into that

Li Cu: ew tmi

Also re: this week’s recent necklace fuckery

I moved my stuff here, I live here now

So you can’t die anymore

Or else…Idk I don’t have a threat planned

anyways abt the curtain

Wu Xie: oh my god, kid…kid you have no idea

I am in tears.

Li Cu: see this is why I can’t be nice to you I can sense the hallmark channel from here

Ugh don’t be sad in ur room that’s dumb

Go hug Pangzi or something

Maybe delete this chat

Or the curtain thing

Focus on the curtain thing

Just stfu and go away

Wu Xie: <3 screenshotting this <3

Li Cu: I take back everything I said. This is why Xiao Ge sleeps on the roof. I hope the ghosts of the Wangs put up that curtain to strangle you somehow. Go die in a stupid way, it’ll suit you.

Wu Xie: lol don’t worry I’m not gonna embarrass you with it or anything

Main Chat

Wu Xie: omg guys look how cute my kid is *sending screenshot*

Wang Pangzi: I MEAN

HE IS WISHING YOU DEATH

BUT SURE

CUTE I GUESS

Wu Xie: no but read the whole thing:):):)

Zhang Qiling: It is indeed very hard to remain angry with you. And you are welcome to join me on the roof.

Wang Pangzi: UH NOPE

NOT WHENI HAD TO BLEACH THE COUNTER IN THE KITCHEN

DONT TRAUMATIZE THE EARLY BIRDS THEYRE ALREADY FREAKED OUT BY U YA HOODIE CRYPTID

Wu Xie: ok true but babe ur like a sexy cryptid

Wang Meng: so, are we just accepting that there is a glittery curtain of unknown origin, and Huo Daofu is going to have to see it while he’s waiting for you at Wushanju bc you’re going to family therapy?

Wu Xie: right

Wang Pangzi: SHOULDA TAKEN EARLY RETIREMENT HUH

Wang Meng: I’m going to go dust something.

Unnamed Chat:

Unknown number: so the curtain…

Unknown number 2: yep, not my best work but I kinda panicked last minute u know

Unknown number: what is in the water at Wushanju that makes everyone dumb and attractive

Unknown number 2: relax they’ll figure it out

[more-than-a-princess]

@dangaer​ asked:  do you have ideal writing circumstances when you can do a lot of drafts or tackle really long ones very easily? & if you are writing a wrong reply that’s not working out, do you save what you have to be continued at another date, or do you scrap it and rewrite? !!

Roleplaying Habits - Accepting!

do you have ideal writing circumstances when you can do a lot of drafts or tackle really long ones very easily?

I better clarify first what ‘a lot of drafts’ means to me: in general, on an average day, I can get out about 2-3 starters or replies, if I’m not otherwise exhausted and/or ill from work, offline life, etc. It’s not a lot by any means, I know I have mutuals who can get to double digit replies in one day. 

However, I write a decent amount most of the time, and on occasion, replies that border on drabbles or novellas. For me, it’s not about the quantity of threads but what I’d believe, for me, to be the quality of threads: longer formats, engaging writing styles, and muns whom I can plot with easily or just play off their writing easily. These muns are often ones I’m friends with OOC and chat about OOC things, but not always: you can’t teach RP chemistry. Sometimes, two writing styles just work, and those muns are on the same page and want to tell the same story, and more often than not they’re engaged to keep replying or keep sending in memes/prompts/starters.

With that in mind...My ideal writing circumstances are a day off work/my work email isn’t constantly pinging with notifications, when I’ve had a decent night’s sleep, I have a mug or pot of caffeinated tea and it’s early afternoon or thereabouts. My fiancé is likely busy with his own hobbies for most of the day so I know I’ll have several hours of uninterrupted writing time. I may have music in the background, often from one of a handful of categories I write to best, and all of my starters and/or replies give me sufficient content to work with. I know where I want to take the story and if I need to do some research, I know what questions I need answers to in order to proceed.

After that, it’s just trying to not feel too tired, in a good way, to get everything out. By late evening, I’ll usually have gotten through at least 3 replies or starters while taking plenty of breaks. I can’t just time myself for an hour and know I’ll get out X number of replies: it doesn’t work that way for me. 

if you are writing a wrong reply that’s not working out, do you save what you have to be continued at another date, or do you scrap it and rewrite?

It entirely depends on the ‘wrong’ type of reply. When I’m struggling with replies, it’s likely due to one of the following reasons:

- I’m just too tired and/or stressed at the moment. Maybe I’ve gotten out 4 replies that day already and I really just want to be a bit more ahead in my draft pile, so I’m trying to force something out. Doubly so after a horrid work day or I’ve spent a lot of time socializing, which drains me.

- I’d really rather be doing something else. This is usually what’s going on if there’s a new show/movie/book I want to get into, or the occasional video game. Or I’d rather be online window shopping, browsing reddit, getting costumes ready, etc. Basically, my attention is just elsewhere.

- The reply I’ve gotten to the thread just isn’t giving me any inspiration. We just don’t have similar writing styles/styles that mesh and/or there’s not enough to work with. This is often due to thread length (there’s nothing wrong with one-liners and short para threads! I just know they’re not for me and it’s a struggle to stay interested in them) but it can be due to the other mun just replying to a thread with answers to questions from my previous reply, or just acknowledging points I brought up in my previous reply, without moving the thread forward. I’m absolutely guilty of this myself at times and try not to do this, but this makes it very hard to focus on writing a great reply when I’m having to come up with more plot points, more ideas, with nothing to build off of. 

In short: passive replies are a huge pet peeve of mine. When I look at new blogs to follow, beyond length and posting frequency, this is the biggest thing I look for: do muns just answer questions and point out that their muse acknowledged what happened in the previous reply, or do they push the thread forward? Do their muses ask new questions, do they bring up changes in the setting or scene, or is it all entirely in their own heads or done just as a response to the previous post? This is part of that mun chemistry/similar writing styles I mentioned.

When I write replies and starters, I’m always saving them somewhere because you never know when the tumblr queue will break. If I’m dealing with one of the first two issues, I’m tired or just distracted, I’ll come back to that reply later. But if a thread just isn’t giving me inspiration? I admit I will just push through it to finish the reply. It’s not great, but if I know I’m never going to really feel this thread anymore but don’t want to drop it (or rather, hurt the other mun by dropping it), I’ll just...kind of half-ass it, I guess.

Which is mean to say, but sometimes my heart just isn’t in a particular interaction. Nothing against the mun and their muses, but it’s really just a writing style incompatibility most of the time that I just didn’t know before we started threading (and occasionally, there’s just not much interesting going on between the muses and it’s better to pick different muses to interact with. But 9 times out of 10, it’s the writing style). 

[autisticandroids]

hi i'm trying to keep up on spn fandom drama without actually watching the 6 seasons I don't care enough to watch so could you tell me what on earth "why lamp" means? tysm

ok so this is a long one. 

so the way i see it there are three major pieces of evidence, in the last two seasons, that dean is going to reciprocate. 

i’m not talking about like, evidence that i would use as a textual analyst if the author was dead: if i use everything that looks to ME like dean being queer then i would have mountains. i’m talking three pieces of evidence which i am absolutely convinced were intentional on the part of the people who write the show, meaning that they suggest deancas might actually go canon officially. 

that’s also why i’m only counting the last two seasons; cas made his deal with the empty in early season fourteen and it was definitely intended to come off as romantic. why do i know this? because it has the same goddamn terms and even wording as angel’s curse from buffy: angel experiences “one moment of true happiness” and he loses his soul, cas experiences “one moment where he is truly happy” and he dies. on buffy, angel’s true happiness is..... well.......... sex with buffy. so when i heard the deal i was like hm. at the time i thought they were just fanservice/easter egging me, but now i know better: they intended that. so i think mr. dabb has been planning deancas endgame since at least them lol. i’m pretty sure they knew the show was ending at that point so they could do it.

anyway the first piece of evidence is dean’s michael fantasy in 14x10. this is imo the second strongest. in it, he’s a bartender, accompanied only by a woman he can never sleep with because she has a boyfriend. they flirt endlessly, and she comments “how come you only want what you can’t have” which is a mirror for what cas says in his confession: “the one thing i want, it’s something i know i can’t have.” she also later comments “besides, you don’t want me, you just like to flirt. i’m psychic, i know.” suggesting that dean is faking his interest in her, which could be normal but reads to me as intentionally suggestive that he’s either uninterested in women or simply hung up on someone else. like “dean pretends to be interested in women to show off his flirting game and flex his dudeness muscles” is a subtext that’s present in a huge amount of the show; like, there are a few female love interests he has chemistry with, but mostly his sexcapades read like i-need-to-prove-i’m-manly bedframe notching or showing off for his buddies. this is even explicit-ish a couple of times, like i said in this post here. but they’ve never explicitly pointed it out in words i don’t think. and like. “pretending heterosexuality” is pretty queer lmao (even if dean is bi he’s still faking ultrastraightness to prove he’s manly/straight). 

also, it’s weird as hell that they picked pamela barnes for that scene. she never had a particularly close connection with the boys or anything, why not someone else? but she’s 1) psychic, so she can say that line about dean not wanting her, and 2) much more importantly, she’s intimately associated with cas. like, she first appears in lazarus rising, and she’s the one who gets her eyes burned out looking at cas’ true face. like that’s her biggest deal: Woman Who Got Her Eyes Burned Out To Show How Dangerous Cas Is. and then she died off pretty quickly because she was a woman on spn s4.

also, in the scene, she wears an angel wing necklace and a shirt that says “to hell and back” (pointed out to me in the same post). plus the guy who wrote the episode also wrote lily sunder has some regrets which i hope we can all agree is an ICONIC destiel episode.

the second piece of evidence is the purgatory confession in 15x09. this is the strongest evidence. i don’t really have much to say about it because it’s so blatant? like, when i first saw it, i was literally like “this is intentional deancas fanservice jesus christ.” like i lean towards generally interpreting deancas stuff as an accident on the part of straight writers and the purgatory thing did not feel accidental to me. and then cas cuts dean off at the end of the confession, before dean can say some final thing, and dean looks devastated, and then we never find out what the final thing was. like, it’s pretty blatant.

the third piece of evidence is the lamp dance. this is the weakest of the three. basically, dean has a dream sequence in 15x10 where he dances romantically with a lamp. given that one of the things that’s going on in 15x10 is that dean is realizing that he could be allowed to have domestic bliss, the apple pie life, and still be a hunter. the dance with the lamp does kind of come off like it’s implying that there is a partner shaped hole in his life. he has no female love interest in s15 and he hasn’t for years. here is a really cool, if way too smart for spn, piece of meta about it, and here’s another which is less cool but acknowledges that spn is dumb and doesn’t think that hard and is therefore imo more correct. also, andrew dabb himself wrote the lamp dance episode, which makes it stronger evidence than it would be otherwise imo.

anyway when i was Feeling the Madness on saturday, i decided to make this joke post based on the format of that one alvin and the chipmunks meme, you know, “if women are oppressed then why ___” (i would not suggest looking at it on my actual blog because tragically that breaks the format, open it in dash). i was basically using the lamp dance as slightly-ridiculous synecdoche for all three of these pieces of evidence because it’s the weakest.

then later that day, because i treat my blog as a deeply self-referential internal monologue, i made this post documenting the madness i was experiencing, and i ended it with “then WHY LAMP” as a reference to my earlier post. that one got popular, and now “why lamp” is a common way to refer to the lamp dance meta.

[itsclydebitches]

...okay, so I know nothing about Dexter except he's like the but what 'if I kill a 100 killers?' meme, but what I DO know is him looking like a homeless lumbercjack in snow cause fandom had a meltdown over it - AND YOU TELLING ME HE'S IN MIAMI CAUSED ME TO QUESTION REALITY! D: [And hey, if you'd wanna advertise me the show my ears are open... xD]

RIGHT? Totally different vibe. Beard!Dexter is a blight on this fandom, for legit reasons other than just facial hair and snow, but those are still unforgivable in their own ways lol. I mean, Dexter's promotional material was a pretty cool mix of playing on his job as a blood splatter analyst (oh ho ho did he cause the splatter?) and playing on his outward image as the supposedly perfect family man (the ketchup he's using is actually blood!), but we also had stuff like this:

The setting is really crucial. If we were set wherever we are at the end of the series (I clearly loved the ending enough to remember where he moved to lol) that would very much mirror the whole serial killer thing; a dark, cold environment to reflect his real self. But by making it Miami, there's this wonderful contrast going on that feeds into both the show's premise — totally normal dude goes about his normal life in this bright, happy, gorgeous weather place — and, by extension, feeds into the show's humor too. It's harder to take Dexter seriously when he's out being all serial-killer-y in a Hawaiian shirt... and alongside enjoying that image, we understand, textually, why no one really suspects him. You know that post going around where OP shows that shot of Hannibal being all creepy in his library and it's like "Oh yeah there's NO WAY anyone would EVER think you're a SERIAL KILLER, guy whose name rhymes with 'cannibal.'" Dexter is the exact opposite of that. At the start of the series one coworker thinks he's shady — presenting expected problems for Dexter — but he's very much the outlier. You don't have to suspend disbelief to go along with everyone trusting, liking, and even loving Dexter. He is lovable.

And that's the cool moral premise. I mean yeah, he's a serial killer. Insert the inevitable tumblr comment about how you can't like the bad guy (/s)... but you're supposed to. Dexter starts the series with a wife, kids, beloved sister, friends at work, and he does love them all. It's not an act put on to get by. The show is very clear that the persona Dexter embodies to not get caught, while inevitably tied up in that Good Brother/Husband/Father lifestyle, is not the sole reason why he created those ties. The premise of Dexter is not "If a killer kills a killer, there are still the same number of killers on Earth, I am so intelligent." It's "What if a cop realized his son would inevitably become a serial killer, so out of love for him taught him to only kill other people who were a danger to the community? And then the son grew up desperately trying to maintain the life he'd built while also keeping his "Dark Passenger" at bay? Would that be fucked up or what?" Dexter is interesting both because he has his code — there are legit conversations to be had both in the story and out about what, if any, merit there is in this kind of vigilante behavior. It reminds me of a similar Criminal Minds episode where a victim hopes a killer won't get caught because he killed her abuser — and because he, outside of the whole killing thing, is a pretty likable guy. You're suppose to struggle with liking him, question what it means to be a monster, figure out what you're willing to ignore for someone you love, etc. Dexter isn't the Joker reveling in chaos for the sake of chaos, nor is his struggle such an angst fest that the show (at least most of the time) feels too edgy. He treats his "Dark Passenger" like a particularly annoying pet he has to take care of. Yeah, it gets dark and serious a lot, but it's also funny as hell.

All of which is made better by casting Michael C. Hall. He's phenomenal in the role.

I don't think any clip encompasses this tongue-in-cheek "He's just a normal dude, doing normal things, definitely nothing to see here ;)" energy quite like the opening does. It PERFECTLY uses the context the viewer has to make everyday actions seem sinister and then contrasts it all with the final shot: how everyone else sees Dexter. It is, totally seriously, one of my favorite openings of anything ever:

Absolutely watch Dexter. Yes, there comes a time when it goes off the rails and the finale is up there with the likes of Supernatural imo, but you can ignore that + the new season might fix some things if we're very, very lucky lol. If you enjoy police procedurals, monster of the week formatting, morally driven storytelling, unreliable narrators, and fantastic ironic humor, Dexter 100% deserves your attention.

[shoichee]

hi ! <3 I Absolutely luv your scenarios!:) Can I request for the pregnant s/o scenario with Midorima & Murasakibara ? :o Thank you :D

HELLO <333 wahhh tysm for reading, and i hope you’re still around lurking here to see this, my anon <33 also, i did write these in headcanon formats but please PLEASE let me know if you wanted scenarios and i’ll whip up scenarios :>

Pregnant S/O with Midorima, Murasakibara

Note: I am also writing this hc under the premise that the S/O has been dating with them for quite some time and is practically settled with them

Part 1 here

Midorima Shintarou

How He Found Out

i would believe for him to always, always use protection whenever he ends up having sex with you, and make sure you’re on birth control to prevent such an occurence

for a pregnancy to even happen, these conditions need to happen: 1.) he needs to be 100% sure that the two of you will be together for a very, VERY long time enough to not freak out about contraceptives or at least toy with the idea of not use any in the back of his mind and 2.) you somehow riled him up so much that he let it slide once/twice and go condom-free (whether you were on birth control or not that’s up to you, but he’d assume you were)

well, it turns out that during one of those rare moments of unprotected sex, you got pregnant, and now here you are with a positive stick in your hand squinting at it and scratching your head that you were either incredibly lucky or unlucky to get pregnant out of those few times you two went raw

how were you gonna tell him? well, he was a traditional man, so you simply set up a small, cute surprise for him when he gets back home

y’know, balloons in the living room and a little wrapped gift on the cleared table… it would send the message across… you think

hours passed and you were on the sofa twiddling your thumbs like a preschooler on timeout LOL and you didn’t want to go anywhere in case Midorima comes home early

your instincts were right because an hour later, he comes home utterly exhausted, immediately thinking about being roundabout in asking to snuggle with you

but then he freezes when his shoe stepped and POPPED one of the balloons you scattered around prior, and it scared him SHITLESS

he almost dropped his lucky claypot. almost.

“(y/n), what is going on?!”

he thinks it’s one of your antics and pranks as usual, and he immediately sighs exasperatedly at the thought of cleaning the mess up

“Seriously, I can never leave you alone in this house, nanodayo…” and as he shuffles through the floor, trying to avoid the rest of the clutter you caused, he notices you sitting primly on the couch (and giving him a poorly-concealed smile)

“Shintaro! I didn’t know you’d come home so soon~”

“Well, everyone was being annoying as usual, and most of the work has been done for today. I might as well come home to spend the rest of the day with you… obviously.”

you were so obvious, your eyes flitting back to the gift on the table and back to him, and Midorima doesn’t know whether to roll his eyes or laugh

“I’m assuming this is all for me,” he sighed, trying to hide his smile. “I don’t recall any special occasion for today, though.”

oh, your face just grew the biggest shit-eating grin at his words

“Is that so?~” you feigned with a sing-song voice

at your insistence on him opening the present right now, he swiftly pulls the ribbon apart and opens the box to see your positive test

MIDORIMA.EXE has stopped working

“W-W-W-What is that?!”

“A pregnancy test.”

“Whose?!”

“... Mine?”

“Wait, how?! With who??”

“Uh…” You stared at him incredulously. “You?”

MIDORIMA.EXE is failing to reboot

you were pointing at yourself and Midorima to further try to get the POINT ACROSS to this poor man who’s trying to process this OFBEJDIWHRIE

but you stopped your hand motions when you see the purest smile slowly growing on Midorima’s normally stoic face

YOU.EXE has stopped working

he brings you into a tight embrace and for a while you two hug in silence, enjoying each other’s company

“So uh, I’m pregnant,” you said, your words slightly muffled by his shirt

“Yes, I am quite well aware now,” he replied dryly, but his eyes are quite affectionate

“I hope you realize that this is a huge responsibility, (y/n).”

“Hey! I know that it’s a big deal! Come on, who do you take me for?”

“... Right.”

During Pregnancy

the first thing he does was take you to the doctor’s just to find out when you were going to deliver

“What? Why?” you asked him

“I must know our child’s horoscope sign as soon as possible,” he said seriously. “We have to make sure they’re born with no misfortunes attached to them.”

“Are you fucking serious?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

MIDORIMA PLEASE-

okay, but he’d also ask the doctor diligently on what you should be doing and what he should be doing to ensure a successful delivery

Midorima is deadass budget-version doctor at home

it’s that one meme where you go:

“Hey mom can we have a doctor?”

Mom: “We already have a doctor at home.”

Doctor at home: Midorima Shintarou

JOKES aside, he really is knowledgeable on this entire ordeal, which is a blessing and a curse

you could always come to him to rely on him when you’re unsure of something or for him to deal with your moodiness

but at the same time, you can’t get away with snacking on abhorrent things because he’d SNATCH them off your hands and scold you for being irresponsible LOLOL

you could NEVER sneak off unhealthy food because he’s ALWAYS somehow there to catch you or he eventually finds out later and still give you an earful

you still try to do it again anyways

then there’s that side of Midorima where he’d stuff the entire house with bundles of lucky items because he insists on buying two lucky items for you and the kid every day during your pregnancy… all so you can “maximize” your chances of having a successful delivery

you’re sobBING, it’s so CUTE BUT SO DUMB

did I mention that he’s already started on building the nursery and decorating it in ALL sorts of lucky charms and adorable plushies under the guise of “being safe and making the room lucky”

he rarely lets you step out of the house, but if you have to, he’ll always make the time for you so he can accompany you and just glower at anyone who looks at you the wrong way

surprisingly, he’s a lot more lenient on the PDA during your pregnancy: LOTS of hand-holding, chaste kisses on your head/forehead and maybe cheeks, and he does often hug you from the side to protect you

if you bring it up to him though, he’ll deny it to the VERY end and insists that he only does it so you don’t get moody and snap at random strangers passing by, and then it’ll be a hassle to deal with them

yeah right, Midorima

Murasakibara Atsushi

How He Found Out

when you first found out, you decided to hide it from him until you can figure out how to go about your pregnancy

1.) he didn’t seem like the type who can handle kids, let alone even like them

2.) you’re worried about how he’d react considering that he has a “devil-may-care” attitude and has quite a languid view on most things, even to this day

you underestimated Murasakibara though because when you first initially excused yourself to the restroom the first few times, he assumed that you were having too many sweets and barred you from consuming them until you got better

but you didn’t… in fact, you looked even sicker as the days progressed

that was when Murasakibara got suspicious and started paying attention to you and your behavior

when he gets serious, he’s incredibly sharp and intuitive

even still, he doesn’t know if he should confront you or wait until you tell him, because you’ve always been the “big pants” in the relationship, for lack of better terms

so he waits and observes, but he still acts just as normally as any other day, and you, on the other hand, thought you were able to successfully hide this from him

still, when you keep up this sneaky behavior around him, he slowly doubts himself about if he did anything wrong, if he forgot anything important, or if you’re doubting this relationship ???

but he’s not going to admit it to you, so he’s going to casually call Himuro and voice his concerns in such a roundabout way

Himuro immediately understands what he’s trying to ask and simply tells him to talk it out with you

ofc, Murasakibara just huffs and complains about it being so troublesome, but Himuro, smiles, knowing him better that he was going to do it despite his verbal complaints

when asking you if he did anything “wrong” and such, you immediately shake your head and deny it all to ease his worries, and you tell him that it wasn’t anything like what he imagined

at your words, Murasakibara was relieved but at the same time, if these weren’t the problems, why were you acting so strange?

like when you kept oversleeping, kept rushing to the bathroom early mornings, or when you even turned down his offer of going to the grocery store, bakery, and the confectionery store together multiple times simply because you said that you didn’t have the energy

he finally confronted after a few weeks of dodging on your end, draping his entire body over you from behind and placing his chin on top of your head

“Chibi-chin…” he mumbled. “You’ve been acting really weird for the past few weeks. Talk to me.”

you only sighed as you turn around and embrace Murasakibara, and then separated from him to put distance between the two of you as you make eye contact with him

you resigned yourself to tell him the truth because he was going to find it sooner or later, considering that you’ve developed a small bump… so far, you’ve passed off your stomach size as a “food baby” and “gaining weight, I guess,” but you knew you couldn’t use that excuse forever

but before you can utter out a single word, dizziness hits you like a truck, making you completely lose balance before you legit fainted on the spot

poor Murasakibara expresses one of his rare moments of absolute distress as he lunged forward to catch you before you fell to the floor

he’s dialing Himuro because he has no idea what to do and he’s absolutely PANICKING and thinking of the worst-case scenarios of what happened to you

Murasakibara was READY TO CALL THE AMBULANCE AND EVERYTHING but Himuro managed to calm him down enough to reason that it’s better to bring you by car

after all, Himuro had an inkling of an idea of what happened to you, but like a little shit, he’s not gonna tell Murasakibara because seeing him so openly expressive like that was a guilty pleasure for him

POOR MURASAKIBARA

he’s constantly holding you in the car like his life is on the line, and Himuro is just driving and looking straight ahead mentally cackling and wondering how he’s gonna escape his wrath if Murasakibara ever finds out that he knew but didn’t tell him

imagine a distraught giant busting through the doors carrying an unconscious you with a model-like guy trailing behind and pushing the giant to the side to try to coherently talk to the disoriented receptionists

what a life

the doctor merely just says that you fainted and it wasn’t serious, and Murasakibara doesn’t believe them ONE BIT

but he notices Himuro walking over to the doctor’s ear and whispering something, before they had an “ah-ha!” moment, and then right on cue, they had you moved to a different room for testing

poor giant is so agitated, constantly shaking his leg on the floor while he’s sitting in the waiting room, jeez HIMURO PLEASE GIVE HIM A BREAK

“Congratulations! She’s pregnant!”

“Huh.”

“Aren’t you her special someone?”

“Indeed, Atsushi is!” Himuro answers for him with a wink

Murasakibara needs to p r o c e s s this

after a while, you groggily stroll out the room like nothing happened, but still you had a frown on your face because you didn’t want Murasakibara to find out about your pregnancy this way

the car ride home was so AWKWARDLY SILENT

when you both get home, he gets SO PETTY AND CHILDISH AND HUFFS AWAY AND REFUSES TO TALK TO YOU

you try to coax him with kisses, hugs, and tickles, but he’s not budging one bit

even snacks didn’t move him… even though he did eye them for a bit before he turned away

“Atsushiiii,” you whined. “Talk to meeee, I’m sorry.” and there you go pouting and trying to squish his cheeks to get him to give up

he looks at you with an uncharacteristically serious look when he asks, “Why didn’t you tell me, Chibi-chin?”

and here you are, reluctantly explaining your reasons, and Murasakibara is just frowning because he’s thinking about how he needs to get his shit together so you don’t ever think that you can’t rely on him again

lots of wholesome cuddling to make it all up to him

“So… Chibi-chin.”

“Yeah?”

“I’m… gonna be a dad?”

“Yeah.”

and he gives you the brightest smile he’s had since the game against the Jabberwocks, except it was much more intimate and sweeter

During Pregnancy

does Murasakibara have any idea on how to deal with pregnancy? no, but to be fair, most people aren’t prepared anyways

he keeps forgetting that he can’t just give you sweets and snacks willy-nilly anymore because that’d be horrible for the you and the child

but he’s always giving them to you out of habit LOL, but of course, usually you turn his snacks down and remind him that you can’t eat them anymore

except when you have ungodly cravings and just accept his offerings without a complaint

and then Murasakibara feels like something feels off before he realizes you’re tearing off the packaging and ready to shove the entire biscuit into your mouth—

from that point on, he’s a lot more diligent in keeping the processed foods away from you

whenever Himuro stops by to help you out, Murasakibara REFUSES to forget what he did before and he glares daggers at him with every chance he gets, and both you and Himuro ignore him and are having your own conversations about the child AND MURASAKIBARA JUST SULKS IN THE CORNER ALL ANGRY—

he’s so petty and he’s so pouty, and honestly he is the one that becomes clingy during your pregnancy

whenever you shop for baby essentials to prepare, he’s always tailing after you like a lost puppy and trying to learn and understand the baby basics(????), while also doubling as your bodyguard

I mean, who would want to mess with you while there’s a purple titan RIGHT there?

still, you get a huge kick when you see people’s shocked expressions at seeing this gigantic man in the baby sections/aisles following around

you noticed, especially during your later trimesters, that he’s even gentler in how he handles and touches you, and it’s super cute that he’s so conscious about his size and strength around you

your heart is LITERALLY melting

you don’t think he even realizes that himself

but still, Murasakibara has to literally grit his teeth to stop himself from glaring/snapping back at you when your mood swings get really bad

how much do you want to bet that Murasakibara makes you buy extra baby food just to try it?

he’d probably even make you taste test it with him

he says it’s so the baby can eat the best brands out there and doesn’t have to eat the shitty food, but you think that he’s just eating it for fun and you tell him not to spoil the baby so early like that

he leaves the decorations and actual planning up to you though, even though he’ll be right behind you as you do it… he just finds it tiring and too complex sometimes

if you send him on grocery errands and things like that, he’d actually get up and do it without a complaint

if it was all for you and his child’s sake, he’ll do anything… after all, it’s the least he can do to be a dependable father

[mikkeneko]

Got tagged by @veliseraptor for a writing meme!

How many works do you have on AO3? What’s your total AO3 word count?

193 works over 10 fandoms;  2,591,823 words.

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

I would count 10 real ones. Dragon Age; Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle; Critical Role; Marvel Cinematic Universe; The Untamed; The Witcher; Cardcaptor Sakura; Fullmetal Alchemist; Gundam Wing; Weiss Kreuz. Some of these pre-date the existence of AO3, and some of them are better off that way.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

A Villain State of Mind; Cover Up the Sun; Laughing As I Pray; I do solemnly swear; The Morning After.  All Loki fandom fics. Not too surprising as that was the most mainstream fandom I wrote for, and they’ve been around for a while now, lots of time to accumulate stats.

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I do! I have a somewhat complex set of criteria for when I respond and how. 

I will respond to all  comments left on works in my current/active fandom except  for: comments consisting entirely of emojis (mainly because I have no idea what to say to that) comments consisting of single words (same) or comments that seem to be about something other than my fic entirely or focus entirely on negativity (i.e., the commentor is using this box as a space to rant about how much they hate a character, the show, or another author/trope.)

I will usually but not always respond to comments on my next-to-last fandom. On older fandoms I will respond only  to especially long or thoughtful comments, or ones that specifically ask a question that I can answer.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

That would have to be Rise From Ash,  the Loki timeloop fic I wrote in MCU. Since it was intended to lead into Avengers, it naturally had a downer ending since we know how Avengers went for Loki; but the story also ended with him having a major mental health break and resolving to kill himself in order to end the timeloop, so, uh, that was pretty unhappy.

Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I think that the Never Gonna Tell A Lie series has to qualify for this one by default; two fics of the “characters from wildly different series meet in a bar” format, spanning seven different franchises.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Occasionally. I can’t answer in a lot of detail because I make a conscious policy of thinking about these comments as little as possible, so I tend to forget the details. Off the top of my head I know I received a few comments on my MCU fics of people complaining that the fic was nothing more than a Thor-bashing exercise (it wasn’t intended as such, but you can’t control how the audience will receive, I guess.) And then there was the whole infamous “ableist torture porn of a mentally ill man” episode.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I can recall. It may have happened that I just don’t know about.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Have you ever had a fic translated?

A fair amount! Sometimes people will leave a comment asking permission to translate. I have always granted it. Sometimes they go through with the translation and sometimes not.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! In Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle I co-wrote a couple fics with @faux-fires which were a lot of fun. (Which... doesn’t seem to be on AO3, huh. But Not Quite Paradise  is still on ff.net.)  And more recently @cerusee and I have been trading scenes back and forth for each other’s stories.

What’s your all time favorite ship?

I don’t know if I have just one. Maybe Kurogane/Fai. They really manage to straddle all my favorite ship dynamics.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Both of my WIPs in Critical Role fandom, Molly’s Moving Castle and Fjord Mustang’s YEEHAW! Fun and Pony Ranch,  are at this point probably never going to be finished. Partly because of Characterization Marches On; the characters that I thought they were when I started writing were not the characters they ended up being in canon. But mostly just because I’m no longer really in the fandom. 

Wonder if it’s worth closing out the WIPs on AO3 with final chapters describing how the fic would have ended?

What are your writing strengths?

I can do humor, I can do horror, I can do heartbreak. I can write a complex outline and stick to it, I have a fair amount of discipline and perseverance. People occasionally compliment my character voice, so I’d say that’s decent. I can spin up a plot for just about any situation. I love  adapting canon to AU. My dialogue is pretty punchy and my action sequences are adequate.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I’m really bad at writing OCs, as I admit to every darn time this comes up. I’ve also recently realized that I have a strong tendency to avoid writing about characters I don’t like, on several fronts.

The first way that manifests is that if there’s a main/good guy character who the fandom likes and I dislike, I will avoid writing about them whenever possible. I don’t do character bashing. (Which means that if I am  writing about a protagonist character, even if they’re being a jerk and the narrative is whacking them for it, that doesn’t mean I hate the character. It just means that the story requires that they get a good whacking, Thor.)

But the second way this manifests is that I will often just... avoid writing about the bad guys, if they’re unpleasant and I dislike them. Which in shorter things is fine! We’re here to read about the characters we like.  But in longer or more plotful things, that means that all of the villain’s bad things happen off screen  if they happen at all, so the audience doesn’t get a chance to really build up anger against them, so their eventual downfall is less satisfying.

I’m also weaker at writing romance than I would like, I’d say. If it’s a story that has a plot, the romance will frequently get shoved in around the corners or at the last minute. If it’s a story that’s supposed to be about romance, the characters will usually sidetrack into having philosophical discussions about moral relativity when they’re supposed to be flirting.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I’m not sure I understand the question. I don’t think this has ever come up in my fic. I do not speak any other languages fluently enough to have ever tried to write any part of my fics, dialogue or otherwise, in a language other than english. Is this asking my thoughts on other  people doing that? Sure, why not?

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

That would have been Gundam Wing! Gosh, it’s been so long that I barely remember what  that first fic was. But the biggest thing I wrote for that fandom was a ghost story on a space station, which was not very good, objectively, but I look back on it and think it had some seeds of a pretty cool horror/psychological drama going there. 

Was Duo Maxwell really  haunting the space station? Or was Heero Yuy just going mad with grief? Who can say.

Tagging! Well, Lise tagged me, so she’s out. How about... @hollyand-writes (if you have the time to spare,) @curiosity-killed, @thethirdamell, @plotdesigner, and @cerusee ?

[elle-imagines]

What are your headcanons of being in a relationship with Kisuke Urahara SFW/NSFW?

Sure thing! He’s such a hard character for me to write for, so I hope there is some semblance of good characterization. Enjoy :)

SFW

Definitely a man content with you and the relationship you both share. He is very laid-back and willing to give you time and space when you need it. No questions about who you hang out with or where you were a few nights ago. He’s Kisuke. He could sniff out motives and lies very easily, and that’s something he wouldn’t even feel the need to do with you. Kisuke has a quiet confidence about him. It does well at ensuring you will be safe and okay when you’re around him. It takes a lot to get him upset, therefore communication flows easily between you two. 

He’s not one to take the lead most times and will follow along with what you’d like to do regarding most things. He does not require a lot to be happy with you, only your company and maybe a few indulgences here and there.

I’m sure his hands are used to giving certain kitties scratches behind the ears, so expect plenty of pats, ruffles, and languid strokes. It could be a pat on your head after you do something “cute” or a leisurely caress against your thigh as you both relax in the evening. He may seem like he isn’t touchy, but he makes sure you feel his presence through his hands throughout the day.

Yes, he has a habit of his hands stray too far.

Speaking of habits, he has a bad habit of ignoring conflict between you two. He will focus on his work, making sure the shop is running properly, or giving you too much space. People skills are not an expertise he likes to indulge in, so he may respond to conflict by trying to fix the problem instead of giving the support and attention you need.

Kisuke knows more about you than he lets on. He’s a great listener and can pick up on your thoughts without much effort. What is unsaid is heard by him. What you wish to share is something he may have already guessed. Kisuke, although seemingly distraced at times, can anticipate your needs and help you before you may even notice. Forgot to charge your phone? It’s plugged in. Have something on your mind? He will sit beside you silently, ready to listen. Bored? He has a few ideas for you… ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°).

With you, he feels less lost and different from those around him. He appreciates and even seeks out your eccentricities or strange habits and collections. No part of him is attracted to what is normative. He finds most things boring, but every aspect of you grips his attention like nothing else. He’s the type of S/O that won’t react negatively when you share your innermost secrets. 

“Oh really?” 

“Ah, you can’t just tell me and not show me.” 

“Tell me more; don’t just stop there.”

“You’re very interesting - not being sarcastic, I promise!”

Intellectual discussion is very necessary! He becomes passionate when showing you his latest and greatest inventions, and enjoys sharing ideas with you. A small part of him really warms to your fascination and praise of him. What is most important to Kisuke is keeping an open mind for everything. You are most likely aware that his shop is a disguise for plenty of Shinigami operations, and I’m postitive he wouldn’t think of dating you in the first place if you were judgemental or did not support what he does. Kisuke is happy, even eager, to hear your thoughts on anything from your favorite pets to human (or Shinigami) nature. Late night discussions over sake is a relaxant for him.

When you both began dating, Kisuke snoops around for information about you. He just can’t get enough of you, even if it crosses ethical lines (sigh). Kisuke is absolutely the type to do a deep investigation of you via the help of his “undercover agents” Jinta and Ururu. You catch on very quickly.

He’s very, very adept at hiding his shy nature around you. Sometimes, you make him feel shy no matter how many years have passed. Relationships require a level of vulnerability he is not used to showing, so patience and understanding is needed on your part when he closes off behind humor or feigned confusion.

When you both communicate by cell phone, he normally leaves you on read or leaves emojis when you ask a question. He’s horrible at keeping it on him, so something Jinta or Ururu would text you that they just found the phone somewhere ridiculous such as in a tree or empty bottle of sake (like, how?). Kisuke prefers to communicate in meme format. 

Despite being a master strategist, master swordsman, master candy seller, he still talks down to himself. Kisuke is great at being humble, but he can downplay his success a lot perhaps due to lingering feelings surrounding his exile. Although he laughs it off, catch him on it and let him know he’s more than adequate just as he is, and his accomplishments are to his name.

“Oh, little ol’ me? Don’t be silly.”

“You flatter me too much, sweetheart.”

NSFW

Remember I said open-minded? This applies here, too. You could list some of the most uncommon kinks you like and he’d just stare back at you with a look that communicates, “then let’s get started”. He has a preference for hair-pulling, dirt talking, perhaps some vouyerism and orgasm control as well.

In bed, he can switch between taking the lead and relaxing to let you take over. Sex is very fun and relaxed for him, so he won’t be frazzled if you want to get on top or you don’t like something in particular. Expect to laugh, for strange sounds to not be awkward, and for it not to be rushed and crazed. He prefers an unhurried, slow torture that leaves both of you shaking.

He prefers deep and slow than fast and hard. He learns what zones and spots get you to keel or become short of breath. Kisuke will take the time to slowly study your body, its triggers, its breaking points. Performing oral is slow and frustrating, just as he likes it. There are moments when he’d just stare at you there, using his index finger to softly carress you in a way that gets you to clench or twitch. He will definitely be the first partner to make you aware that you have a sensitive area behind your knees or right at the small of your back. 

“This seems to get you going.”

“Suddenly shy, now? Let me look, just for a bit…”

“I see now. I may have learned something new.”

For Kisuke, his scalp is very sensitive. A sharp tug is a silent action to get him to thrust faster, and a rake of your nails down his scalp tells him to go slower. You can be a bit rough with him, since he likes sharp sensations soothed by soft ones. When using your hands on him, feel free to oscilatte between a tight grip around him and a quick clench around his balls, then softening the sliver of pain with your mouth at the frenulum. Mad skills.

With taking his time with you, comes the orgasm control. He watches your expressions carefully and will slow down what he is doing or stop altogether when he notices you are about to orgasm. A little bit of control in the bedroom is just enough for him, and he knows how to exercise it perfectly. His voice is soothing but you can tell by how firmly he clenches your thighs he isn’t messing around.

“I don’t remember saying you could come yet.”

“Try to be a little patient now, love.”

“We may have to stop playing if you can’t delay some gratification.”

A few stints in the storage room is not uncommon. A measly excuse of needing help finding something directed at you instead of his actual employees is an obvious clue. Not even taking all of each other’s clothes off, he gets aroused twice as fast at the idea of life going on beyond the storage room while you both engage in something indecent. He enjoys more subtle forms of vouyerism such as performing oral while on phone calls, or using his hands on you from underneath a table while maintaining composure. Like I said, Kisuke enjoys fun, and he also enjoys having something at stake. He doesn’t care about the smell of sweat and sex on him as he emerges from an escapade, either,

“Don’t worry, just a fever. You’ll get better soon, won’t you dear?”

“Thanks for calling. They’ll be coming soon, don’t worry.”

“Ah, I just needed help finding something. It happened to be in my pocket all along…”

“Don’t make too much noise, now.”

“Hush, a little longer and I’ll reward you later.” 

[esmeraldablazingsky]

I’ve finally hit my limit on the number of bad takes on the Lan parents I can see before I have to lay out all the reasons I disagree, so hello, I’m Blazie, and in this essay I will justify my visceral dislike of the assumption that Qingheng-jun married/imprisoned/had sex with Lan-furen against her will.

    Warning for mentions of rape (in context of Interpretations I Really Hate) and a very, VERY long post below the cut.

    Before I start going off about the finer points of all this, I want to make sure people are on the same page regarding what we actually know about what went down with Qingheng-jun and Lan-furen. What I say is based off the EXR translation of MDZS, for the sake of clarity, and although I don’t think the exact wording should be too important, feel free to let me know if you think I’ve missed an important bit of nuance or something (the whole story is in Chapter 64.)

    The story we get is told by Lan Xichen, and it goes like this: a young Qingheng-jun falls in love at first sight with Lan-furen, who doesn’t return his feelings, and at some point kills one of Qingheng-jun’s teachers over unspecified “grievances.” Although he’s understandably very upset over the murder, Qingheng-jun sneaks Lan-furen back to Cloud Recesses and officially marries her in order to announce to his clan that anyone who wants to hurt her has to go through him.

After that, he locks Lan-furen in one house and himself in another as a form of repentance. Wei Wuxian speculates that this was because “he could neither forgive the one who killed his teacher nor watch the death of the woman who he loved. He could only marry her to protect her life and force himself not to see her.” 

    A central detail of this story that I think people don’t give the import it deserves is that aside from marrying and protecting her, Qingheng-jun’s other option was to let Lan-furen be executed by his clan. His purpose in marrying her wasn’t just for kicks/out of a possessive sort of love, it was so she wouldn’t straight up die. How she felt about this arrangement isn’t stated, but I’ll get into that in a bit. In addition to that, Qingheng-jun and Lan-furen live separately, which was apparently purposeful on Qingheng-jun’s part, and runs counter to the interpretation that he intended to take sexual advantage of Lan-furen.

Though there aren’t many concrete details in Lan Xichen’s retelling, he does specifically inform Wei Wuxian that his mother never complained about remaining in her house. What exactly this signifies is unclear— whether she was simply putting on a brave face for her sons, or whether she was in fact at all content with the situation— but it at the very least serves to further muddy the waters on how she and Qingheng-jun felt about all this. 

Beyond what Lan Xichen and Wei Wuxian are saying out loud, there’s also quite a bit of subtext in this scene, especially in light of later events and revelations, like Lan Xichen’s confession for Lan Wangji at Guanyin Temple. 

So what is Lan Xichen trying to convey with all this? There’s a lot of memes about this scene, most of which err too far on the side of Himbo Airhead Lan Xichen for my liking, but one that I do find amusing emphasizes how Lan Xichen draws parallels between Wangxian and the story of his parents (Lan Xichen: [flute solo] please use your one brain cell to connect the dots.) If Wei Wuxian hadn’t completely lost his memory of Lan Wangji defending him against his own clan elders, one would assume that Lan Xichen’s story would have had a much better chance of hitting home. 

In hindsight and side by side, the parallels are much clearer— Qingheng-jun, “ignoring the objections from his clan… told everyone in the clan that she would be his wife for the rest of his life, that whoever wanted to harm her would have to pass through him first.” Similarly, according to Lan Xichen in Chapter 99, “for [Wei Wuxian,] not only did WangJi talk back to him, he even met with his sword the cultivators from the GusuLan Sect. He heavily injured all thirty-three of the seniors we asked to come.”

In that context, it makes a lot less sense to interpret Qingheng-jun as an aggressor towards Lan-furen, as in Lan Wangji’s case, the narrative clearly establishes that his actions are to secure Wei Wuxian’s safety. The action of Taking Someone Back To Cloud Recesses is— okay, actually, it’s a little more nuanced than I took into account when I started writing that sentence, so let me go a little deeper into Lan Wangji’s actions and how they relate to his father’s, story-wise. 

My intent is not to dive into the terrifying underworld of novel-versus-drama discourse, but simply put, Novel!Lan Wangji as he is written isn’t exactly the poster child for clear consent. (I’m going to entirely leave off the extra chapters for the sake of everyone’s sanity, so I’m just talking about the main body of the novel here.)

He means well, and I’m sure we can agree that he does actually love and want the best for Wei Wuxian, but his lack of communication on this point means that he accidentally gives Wei Wuxian the impression that he wants to imprison and/or punish him in Cloud Recesses at least twice off the top of my head (pre-timeskip, as we know, and post-timeskip immediately after Dafan Mountain when he actually drags Wei Wuxian back to his room.) 

That all likely has something to do with MXTX’s narrative kinks and regular kinks and all that, and can absolutely be taken with many grains of salt. However, these events establish how easy it is to misinterpret the action of Taking Someone Back To Gusu as an attempt to imprison rather than protect them (much to Lan Wangji’s chagrin.)

Failing to communicate his purpose to Wei Wuxian doesn’t mean that Lan Wangji actually had any intent of hurting or caging him— that was just a misinterpretation on Wei Wuxian’s part, and we, as the audience, find that out in due time— but as written in the novel, it can be really uncomfortable to read. Because of that, many people choose to accept CQL canon regarding Lan Wangji’s more possessive actions or mix characterization from different adaptations, which, to be clear, I completely understand and respect. 

However, Qingheng-jun doesn’t get the benefit of the doubt as often, which I frankly find baffling, because nowhere in the text does it state that Lan-furen objected to being taken back to Cloud Recesses, while even Wei Wuxian clearly objected the first few times. In fact, while we’re on this note, I’ll take it a step farther— I find it baffling that people seem to default to an unsympathetic view of Qingheng-jun, because nowhere in the text does it state that he overruled Lan-furen’s wishes in any way. The text doesn’t clarify a lot of things, actually, and that is part of the point. 

The narrators of MDZS are, in many situations, highly unreliable. This is, presumably, very purposeful! MDZS can easily be read as a sharp criticism of reputation and mass judgment and the concept of condemning people without knowing their motives! And I don’t want to sound mean, but guys… did any of us learn anything from that? Here, I’m going to put it in meme format for a second to convey what I mean. 

MDZS: It’s easy to condemn someone as a villain if you don’t know their story or the reasons behind their actions

MDZS: Anyway, here’s a character whose story and reasons behind his actions you know nothing about

Some Parts Of This Fandom: Ah, a villain 

    Memes aside, here’s what I want to point out. It’s entirely possible to assume Qingheng-jun was a bad person who disregarded a woman’s wishes in marrying and confining her when all you have is Lan Xichen’s (actually very neutral, thank you Lan Xichen for being an eminently reasonable and concerned-with-evidence character) account of what happened. It would also be at least that easy to assume Wei Wuxian was just an evil necromancer if he hadn’t un-died and brought his own story to light, or even to believe that Lan Wangji had somehow tamed Wei Wuxian into submission and being a respectable cultivator if you were an average citizen of Fantasy Ancient China with nothing but rumors to operate on. 

    The thing about Qingheng-jun and Lan-furen’s story, then, is that there is nobody left alive who knows the full tale. Nobody knows what they thought about anything, really. Nobody even knows why Lan-furen killed Qingheng-jun’s teacher. Wei Wuxian asks why, and Lan Xichen can’t tell him, but I think the best answer would be something along the lines of I don’t know, Wei Wuxian, why did you kill people? Your guess on the motivations of your own thinly disguised narrative parallel are as good as anyone’s. 

    So, while it’s not technically impossible to assign darker motives to Qingheng-jun, the cautionary tale of MDZS seems to warn against that exact assumption. 

    I’ve refrained from getting too salty on a personal level thus far, but now that I’ve said a lot of the more logical and story-based points of my argument, I will say that at least some of my annoyance with the interpretation of Qingheng-jun as a possessive rapist and Lan-furen as his victim stems from the fact that I just think it’s straight up boring. Where’s the nuance? Aren’t you tired of reducing these characters to the flattest possible versions of themselves? Don’t you just want to add a little flavor? 

    In a slightly more serious phrasing of that criticism, I find that making Lan-furen a helpless prisoner strips her of whatever agency she might otherwise have. To be fair, she’s more or less a non-character in keeping with the general state of the MDZS universe, but making her a damsel in distress only consigns her more deeply to hapless, milquetoast innocence. 

    It’s perfectly valid to enjoy ladies who have done nothing wrong, ever, in their lives, but like… Qin Su is right there, if that’s your ball game. There’s also really no need to make Qingheng-jun someone who doesn’t respect women. Isn’t Jin Guangshan enough for at least one universe? 

    Anyway, ultimately, you do you. I don’t like arguing on the internet, and will just ignore things I don’t agree with (or write an 1800 word vaguepost) like a mature human being. I’m just saying, if it’s a cut and dry tale of imprisonment and assault you’re looking for… you probably don’t want to turn to a woman who committed a murder and a man who loved her enough to forfeit everything to keep her safe. 

[bokutokoutarou]

@tsukideshima​ asked: Not sure if this is an emergency request but can I have headcanons for tsuki, bokuto and suga with an s/o who has depression and on days it's bad she completely shuts down like barely getting off the bed to eat her meals and tries to sleep the enture day off? Thank you so much, my depressions has just been acting up and quarantine is not helping—

of course this counts as an emergency request! i really hope you feel better soon, and if you ever want to talk then i’m here :)

warning - mentions depression

[a/n] - i’m formatting my posts like this from now on instead of answering asks directly because tumblr’s being mean to me and is inserting a ‘read more’ right after the ask :(

⌜ •   °    +   °   •   ⌝

TSUKKI, BOKUTO, AND SUGA WITH A DEPRESSED S/O

masterlist

☆。*。☆。 Tsukishima Kei

Tsukishima’s no stranger to depressive-like symptoms, so that just makes him even more motivated to make sure that you don’t feel the same way

If you try to sleep in all day, he’ll straight up pick you up with no remorse and carry you out of bed

He may be a bit scrawny, but he can lift you up like it’s nothing

You’ll try to protest and squirm out of his hold, but there’s no way that he’s letting you win because:

“Nice try, [Y/N], but there’s no way you’re sleeping the whole day away on my watch”

If he ever notices that you’re not eating as much or that you’re skipping meals, he’ll go on a whole TANGENT about how your body needs nutrients to live

Once, during one of his rants about how you need to eat to survive, he made an offhand comment about how he wouldn’t know what he’d do without you alive and you both turned BRIGHT RED after what he said processed in your minds

“Kei, did you just say...” you trailed off, completely red in the face and speechless at his words

Tsukishima was completely stunned at what he said, but he didn’t try to take it back or deny it because it was true. He needed you just as much as you needed him

“Yeah, yeah I did,” he told you, and his lips curled upwards into one of his rare smiles that you had fallen in love with

Tsukki’s not very big on hugs or affection, but as awkward as he may be, he won’t hesitate to pull you into a hug if your depression is acting up

During quarantine, he’d try to cheer you up by sending you jokes and memes that are only funny because of how unfunny they are

Also, he’ll send you dinosaur memes because he’s a huge nerd and it’s adorable

Even though he tries to hide it sometimes, there’s no denying that he cares about you so much, and he will do anything to make sure that you’re okay

☆。*。☆。 Bokuto Koutarou

Honestly, if Bokuto’s around then there’s no use in even trying to stay in bed because this boy will find a way to get you up no matter what it takes

It’ll start off with him shaking you lightly and enthusiastically trying to convince you to get a fresh start to the day by waking up early

“RISE AND SHINE, [Y/N]!!!”

Of course, that never works, so then he’ll jump into the bed with you and start tickling you to try to wake you up

“STOP IT KOU,” you always say in between your uncontrollable giggles. “YOU’RE GOING TO MAKE ME PEE”

That method usually works, but one time it didn’t, so he texted Kuroo because he honestly didn’t know what to try next

Kuroo told him that he should play an alarm sound on his phone to straight up ANNOY you awake, and although Kuroo was half-joking, Bokuto actually listened

This boy straight up played the most ANNOYING alarm sound you’ve ever heard until you got so pissed off that you had to get out of bed and shut it off yourself

Kuroo almost pissed himself when you angrily texted him what Bokuto did

If Bokuto notices that you’re eating less because of your depression, then he’ll make you a “special” home-made meal that he thinks you can’t resist

Of course, Bokuto can’t cook for shit (although you’ll never tell him that), but you’ll end up eating the whole thing because you feel bad for him

Somehow Bokuto got the right result with the wrong formula, but hey, at least it worked

Bokuto will give you the BIGGEST hugs to cheer you up, and you can practically feel your serotonin boosting whenever he wraps his arms around you and peppers you with kisses

During quarantine, he’d spam you with the stupidest memes in an attempt to cheer you up, and he’d send you random selfies of him doing dumb stuff throughout the day to try and make you laugh

You always do because he’s so dumb that it’s adorable

Even though Bokuto’s kind of clueless sometimes, he just loves you so damn much and he means the best. He just wants to see you smile, because he can never be truly happy if he knows that you’re not

☆。*。☆。 Sugawara Koushi

Sugawara’s a literal sweetheart, but he’s not a pushover, ESPECIALLY when it comes to your mental health

He likes to brighten your day from the very beginning by bringing you breakfast in bed (as long as you promise to get up right afterwards), and unlike Bokuto, Sugawara can ACTUALLY cook

His meals are god-tier so you can’t even resist eating them even if your appetite decreases because of your depression

He’s literally getting you to eat and motivating you to get out of bed all at once

Suga always makes sure to check in on you and how you’re doing. He’s really understanding, and he always lets you know that he’s there for you no matter what

He’s so calming and therapeutic, so you find it extremely easy to talk to the boy about anything that you’re struggling with

Whenever your depression acts up, he tries to make you feel better by cuddling you and putting on a cheesy rom-com for you two to watch

He calls his cuddles “serotonin cuddles”. It’s literally the cheesiest thing ever and HE KNOWS IT, but that doesn’t stop him from calling them that

As much as you hate to admit it, you always feel so much happier whenever you’re wrapped in his warm embrace

During quarantine, he’d spam you with facetime calls to make sure that you’re doing alright

Also, he’ll make sure that you send pictures of your plate before and after you eat to make sure that you’re eating enough because he’s SUCH a mom

Suga honestly cares about you more than anything in the world, and he’s not afraid to show it

As long as you’re happy, he’s happy, and in his opinion, there’s NO better feeling than the feeling he gets in his chest whenever he sees you smile

[foryoumyheroes]

Stan Twitter

[Midoriya + Todoroki + Bakugou + Kaminari] and their secret stan accounts.

A/N:  Gender neutral reader and [H/N] stands for [Hero Name].  Aged-up AU and everyone is already a Pro-Hero. Kinda SMAU? 

Disclaimer: I recently became aware that the word “simp” has been appropriated from AAVE. As someone who is not from the black community, I genuinely apologize and I don’t have an excuse for my ignorance. I am removing it from these hcs! I consider myself an ally (but I clearly have a lot of work to do) and it is my own fault for not educating myself, which I hope to do more of in the future.

I also have to give credit where credit’s due I love @myherowritings​ ‘s SMAUs and was inspired to write this from their works so please check them out if you’re reading this!  

Izuku Midoriya: 

Goes the whole mile. Has a [Name] stan account with 10k followers. Interacts with other [H/N] stans regularly. Retweets edits and compilations. Makes his own fancams and edits. 

Vote [H/N] for the top ten  @[H/N]might345  I am so lucky to be able to get the entire @official[Hero Name] x @Super_Groupies collaboration collection!! It sold out within minutes! 💨💨 It was kinda stressful haha. 😅 Thanks again to everyone who supported our favorite Hero! http://bit.ly/G4peUrTd36A

Vote [H/N] for the top ten @[H/N]might345 Thank you to tik tok user @rainbowinureye for giving me permission to post their playdate edit of [H/N]! It’s so well done and the cuts and the scenes line up perfectly 😊 http://m.tiktok.com/WrqKOXWpYbU  

Vote [H/N] for the top ten  @[H/N]might345 I made another [H/N] edit to the song “This is Love” by Illene Woods slowed and pitched version 😊💕💕 Please tell me what you think and how I can improve! http://bit.ly/dK9-c7QOcWg 

Of course it’s edited perfectly with all of the clips synced up perfectly?? It’s a byproduct from his All Might days. He’s still sure to respond to every person who gives him constructive criticism on how to improve his edits. 

Unintentionally becomes a meme?? Becomes known as the fanboy to end all fanboys. Like this guy is EVERYWHERE. He’s in the comments of every [H/N] funny moments and [H/N] battles but every fight is poorly edited to the sound of vines and every official interview posted by official YT channels. 

Stream Fine Line  @randomaccount360 The wildest thing about Twitter is that one [H/N] stan account that comes running whenever you mention their name. 

Vote [H/N] for the top ten @[H/N]might345 replying to @randomaccount360  hahaha! I am here! 😁

High-key people think that he’s one of those stalkerish fans?? Like he’ll post pictures of you eating at super close angles that no other news site has and it isn’t like a pic a fan has asked for either... it’s like a candid photo of you shoveling back food 

But you guys are legitimately dating?? He lives with you?? It’s just so embarrassing to know that he runs this popular stan account of you that you rarely bring it up asdfg ;; You ;; politely look away.  

Vote [H/N] for the top ten @[H/N]might345 Isn’t @official[Hero Name] the cutest? Here’s them eating the souffle pancakes at Flipper's! It was super good! http://bit.ly/fQE__7riZko

Mashomallow @mashomallowfood  replying to @[H/N]might345 OP how do you know what the pancakes taste like 

Pinky step on me @Minastannn replying to @mashomallowfood  OP pls respond it’s a legit question 

thehighground @ayeyeye  replying to @[H/N]might345  @official[Hero Name] if you are in danger please wink twice  

OHH if you get hate?? He will respectfully put that person in their place in the most eloquent way possible. Five pages, doubled-spaced, MLA format, works cited page. 

[H/N] > Deku >:(  @[H/N]might345  It has recently come to my attention that people online have been saying that Deku is a better hero than [H/N] and I am here to say that is not the case. Not only is pitting two heroes against each other extremely toxic but [H/N] has shown time and time again that they are the more successful Hero. [1/24] 

Show this thread 

He exposes himself by being tagged in those “Get to know them better” trends and it wasn’t like he was ever hiding the fact that he ran the stan account so he has no problem doing it. He’s so casual with posting a selfie of himself and saying his name and likes and dislikes but the people who tagged him just thought that he was just a regular fan?? Not Pro-Hero Deku?? 

#WTFDeku is trending for a whole day in Japan. 

It answers a lot of questions but opens up more. 

Everyone legit thought that @[H/N]might345 was just a rich kid with a lot of free time this whole time. But no?? It was Number One Hero Deku?? Does he make the edits when he’s fighting villains or something asdfg 

It makes him so happy though!! You guys would be chilling and his phone dings from notifications and he’s turning to you so happily like, “Look, [Name]! Another popular fan account retweeted my compilation of you! I can’t believe they noticed me!” Asdf i love this boy. 

Shoto Todoroki: 

LOOK even before you two debuted as Pro-Heroes he was your number one stan buying all the merch, watching all of the interviews. 

Interacts with other fans occasionally. 5K followers. Verified by Twitter for some reason. Has a generic name like @[Name]snumberone and thinks that it’s polite to always end his posts with a simple :) 

He’s told you about his side account before, but you know that he has one dedicated to Endeavor hate, so you always think that he’s referring to that one. 

Horny on main for some reason?? People think that he’s socially inept and doesn’t really understand a lot of jargon or slang, but thanks to Kaminari and all of the other stans he’s studied up because he thinks that’s how you’re supposed to talk on the internet. 

Like someone will post a pic of you holding something between your thighs like a water bottle or your phone or wallet while you tie your hair up or sign something for a fan and he’ll be like “goD i wish that was me.” 

it’s photosynthesUS @queenking[H/N]  Can you believe that there are people out there that don’t think about [H/N]’s thighs at least once a day?? coughcough anyWAY on an unrelated topic here’s several pictures of those beautiful legs http://bit.ly/pH6KeOjpKeI

[H/N]’s biggest fan @[Name]snumberone replying to @queenking[H/N]  I can die happy if those legs suffocated me 

[H/n]’s biggest fan  @[Name]snumberone  Another fan messaged me saying that they liked my account :) thank you. I love [H/N] more than anything. 

[H/N]’s biggest fan  @[Name]snumberone Someone messaged me this from a site called Archive of Our Own? They said since I like [H/N] so much I would like this. It’s pretty enjoyable :) although kind of OOC? (is that right?) 

[H/N]’s biggest fan @[Name]snumberone I thought I would try my own hand at [H/N] fanfiction since it was so fun to read I binged the entire tag last night :) But please be warned that it’s not for underage readers. 

Would try to fight the haters in the most passive-aggressive and aggressive-aggressive way possible. He had no problem with trying to square up against the chief of police and he’s incredibly stubborn. He immediately responds to their post and tries to shut it down as quick as possible and sometimes it’s ;; kinda hurtful 

One time a hater account was spreading negative things about you and after Shoto came on the scene they quickly ended their thread with a “Of course [H/N]’s white knight came to save the day again 🙄🙄”

Within the next hour he changed his bio to “[H/N]’s white knight” 

Doesn’t get that trend where after someone posts something thirsty about someone else another user will reply by thanking them for something random? 

[H/N]’s biggest fan @[Name]snumberone Has anyone seen [H/N]’s arms after their most recent fight with a villain? They can break my back like a glowstick :) and stick their tongue down my throat ig 

Stradandelous @pikadeegeek  replying to @[Name]snumberone  Thank you for paying for my anger management classes :))))

[H/N]’s biggest fan @[Name]snumberone replying to @pikadeegeek  Oh, do you have me confused for someone else? I know that @realbakusatsuou needs anger management lessons 

He gets exposed after someone posts a picture of you and him smiling at each other cutely and someone responds with “🥺🥺 get someone who looks at you the way Shoto looks at [Name] and soba. It must be nice to kiss one of the cutest Heroes of the century” 

[H/N]’s biggest fan @[Name]snumberone  replying to @bossbiccc Thank you but soba will always be number two to [Name] :) and it was nice. 

Everyone then collectively LoSeS their minds and connects the dots like hUH?? You included!! You aren’t spared from this shit!! You spend your whole day with your jaw dropped to the goddamned grOUND as you scroll through his side account. Did he try all of that before or AFTER writing his fanfiction?? 

Endeavor gets news of it and learns just how horny his youngest son is and nearly goes into cardiac arrest. 

He just slurps his soba when everyone under the sun confronts him about it and he’s just like “what about it?” 

Katsuki Bakugou: 

About 600 followers. Doesn’t interact with anyone other than retweeting posts and liking them. Rarely comments. Never answers DM’s. Only follows one person and that’s @official[Hero Name].

You don’t know about it. No one knows about it. If he had it his way, no one will ever know about it.  

Occasionally he posts, but it’s mostly him flaunting the fact that he got limited edition or super expensive [H/N] merch that gets sold out in seconds and he’s super fucking smug. 

my hero [Name] @[H/N][Name] check out my limited edition [H/N] figurine. their costume is covered in real strakowski crystals. they did a good job with the face too.

Whatcanisayyyy his parents are designers. He has a taste for the finer things in life. 

He’s not much of a texter in general? So he doesn’t go off on lengthy arguments with people who post hate like the other two. Surprisingly mature when he does this. He reports or blocks them, but he’s always proud to know that these lowlife people can’t bring up a good argument because he always finds holes in their points. (They also don’t have the whole story. Which is? He loves you.) 

NEVER retweets or likes content that involves you and another Hero being shipped together. Purely Ground Zero x [Hero Name] only. Who gives a damn that Creati x [Hero Name] got the most votes from the Official [H/N] Fan Club?? Bakugou ,,, does not see it. 

Kinda boring really ;; he only has that many followers because he only retweets the BEST [Name] content and he’s fucking proud of it. 

He gets exposed when you and he get dragged to a club with Bakusquad one day. You’re on the dance floor with Mina and Sero and he’s just reclining in the booth retweeting paparazzi pictures of you that night and Kaminari manages to sneak up behind him and takes a picture of him without him noticing. People ofc zoom into his phone screen and find out that hE FUCKING HAS A WHOLE STAN ACCOUNT DEDICATED TO YOU?? When y’all are dating?! He’s retweeting photos of you in your outfit that night when he was right there?? He sometimes uncharacteristically comments 🥺 or 😍 or “my love”??? 

The goddamned UWUs that are passed around that night!!

The unsuppressed anger 😨😨

Pikachu’s long lost son @NOTjammingway @realbakusatsuou YOU WERE THE CHOSEN ONE!! IT WAS SAID THAT YOU WOULD DESTROY THEM NOT JOIN THEM!! 

Red Riot @theofficialredriot replying to @NOTjammingway The PLOT TWIST OF THE CENTURY! NOT EVEN THE SHARINGAN COULD’VE PREDICTED THIS

Cellophane @Serophanetape  replying to @theofficialredriot  No wonder he’s changed since our school days... 😔😔 as his bros we should’ve seen it... the good in him...the c o n f l i c t 

Pro Hero Ground Zero @realbakusatsuou  replying to @NOTjammingway  Shut. The fuck. UP!!! 

Pikachu’s long lost son @NOTjammingway  ASDFGHJKLHELPMEEEEE http://bit.ly/DVtNve4qySA

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woah pass that  @hellofolksclapclap Transcription of @NOTjammingway’s post that was taken from his IG live for anyone that needs it 😊

[Chargebolt]: [to Red Riot] and anyway, I there I was barbecue sauce— [two knocks appear on his door]. Huh?  [Red Riot]: [walking to the door] were you expecting anyone?  [Chargebolt]: No—? [Door slams open loudly. It falls to the ground off its hinges.] [AHHHHASDGHSPE?] [T/N: how did he manage to keysmash in real life?] Bakugouuuu! [Screams impressively high pitched.]  [Ground Zero]: I’m going to fucking kill you!  [Red Riot]: Bakugou, no! Stop! What would [Name] think?! [Ground Zero]: [Name] can’t fucking look at me without laughing anymore!  [A whole bunch of voices interlap and more screaming ensues.] [A faint ‘wheee’ is heard.]  [END.] 

Eventually he just fucking owns it and is like yEAH!! I HAVE A [NAME] STAN ACCOUNT WHAT OF IT?? 

hero for all  @official[Hero Name] Love you too, @[H/N][Name] <3 <3

Pro Hero Ground Zero @realbakusatsuou  replying to @official[Hero Name] ...You’re lucky I didn’t deactivate the whole fucking account. 

He still retweets things to this day, but now he’s getting more bold. 

Denki Kaminari: 

Unlike the others his official twitter IS his [Name] stan page. 

He’s going back and forth from posting about his battles, his promotional content, and then splits them all with retweets that are like “I’ve NEVER wanted to hold a hand so bad before in my life. I SWEAR!” 

IMAGINE if he did have a stan account though. He would be going back and forth between his official and stan account and like fake beefing with each other. 

Pikachu’s long lost son @NOTjammingway  [Name] just defeated 28 villains today!!! FUCK👏ING👏TWENTY EIGHT👏 The talent in this household... the sexiness... 😳😳

i sent you my love pls respond @[H/N]steponme replying to @NOTjammingway Dude I’m going to steal your lover 

Pikachu’s long lost son @NOTjammingway  replying to @[H/N]steponme  You wouldn’t dare 😤 😤😡

i sent you my love pls respond @[H/N]steponme replying to @NOTjammingway   If that’s your lover why are they buying MY animal crossing turnips? 

Pikachu’s long lost son @NOTjammingway replying to @[H/N]steponme @official[Hero Name]... say it isn’t so... 

hero for all @official[Hero Name]  replying to @NOTjammingway  What the FUCK is going on 

Pikachu’s long lost son @NOTjammingway  Replying to @[H/N]steponme They’re in your acnh island but they’re replying to MY tweets we are not the same 

Since he’s a Pro-Hero and therefore a public figure, sometimes he gets flagged by karens on the internet for saying stuff like “pls sit on my face [Name]” on his official twitter and he always replies to comments that are like “Think about the children!” with “This AINT about them!!”  

If his S/O is getting hate he’ll reply to them such as

dog mom coffee lover @lilyjargon920 I’m sorry I can’t help it, [H/N] is so ugly ESPECIALLY after a fight 

Pikachu’s long lost son @NOTjammingway replying to @lilyjargon920 That’s a strange way to say that you’ve never gotten anyone hot and bothered 

Flip-flops between being super horny and “Can i hold your hand ;;; PLEASE” 

Whenever he takes mirror selfies in his bedroom his bed is like ;; half [H/N] plushies 

Because he’s not hiding anything he’s able to interact with your page freely and most of the time his retweets get more likes than your tweet because he’s just randomly thirsty without it having anything to do with your og tweet. 

He tries tik tok trends on you and reposts it on his twitter as well. He tried the “getting naked in front of partner” challenge while you were in the middle of working at your desk at home and you just looked at him like “Put some clothes on HOE” while laughing and getting back to work. 

He posts Boyfriend ASMR POVs but most of them are like self-indulgent fanfiction and he’s talking to “[Name]” instead of making it open to everyone. 

Everyone in Class 1-A clowns him so hard for this. 

Present Mic plays one of them during his radio one day as a request from a listener and he had to leave the room but since he’s so loud his laughter was basically the only thing people hear.